The Story of Home
Christopher La Porte

I really hate to make any negative comments, but I have to be honest. I got stuck on the first sentence — ‘In the store where I work at’? I kept reading but my mind continued repeating that sentence. Maybe ‘At the store where I work…’ it’s hard to get past a sentence that ends in a preposition. Espcially when it’s the first sentence in a piece.

Technically you can end a sentence that way or not, grammatically. However, you should consider that your reader may get stuck. I’m so sorry to say this. I did enjoy the story. I saw the bird dancing. Home is a great connection. I especially loved: ‘Those shared experiences, even though each experience is personal, allow true connection to the characters you are writing and the plot that’s unfolding.’

Thanks for following through in your conclusion. Overall a great sentiment.

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