The hater’s pen..
I don’t worry about haters…. They are just angry because the truth I speak contradicts the lie they live-Steve Maraboli
Who is a hater? Are they people who have bad opinions on good things? or are they people who have bad opinions on everything?.
The urban dictionary defines a hater as a person who simply cannot be happy for another person’s success.
What caught my attention next is do some people genuinely have an intention of killing someone’s happiness? or else why does a hater, hate?
We are all human beings. We might have different tastes, different ideas, different talents and many of difference that divides us,and this is mainly because of the background we grew up and what we learnt from it. So as we move on in life we face barriers, obstacles which teaches us different life lesson, which divides us by our opinions and ideas again.Most of these hatred are based on emotions which later turns in to action and words but before I list these down I want to say these aren’t excuses for a person to hate.Just because you have experience these emotions does not give you the right to hate.Thus, here are few reasons why haters hate on people
1.Fear
2.Acceptance
3.Pride
4.Depression
1.Fear
This is one of the main reasons haters give away their opinion. You see, people have different perspectives and views on life that makes us have various amounts of principles and rules for our living. The fear that your opinion is not approved can ‘cause the hater to put out what he/she has in mind. Now the way of putting these thought out can vary,but something all hater have is a little bit of fear.
2.Acceptance
Now, this is something that hater’s crave. For an example, imaging it is your first day at a new job and all your co-workers gather around one table for lunch raising the typical “roast the boss” topic.But unfortunately for you, the boss is actually your best friend in high school who is still very close to you and was kind enough to offer you the job. You come to a place where you are stuck in between two decisions,Do I stand against this and be hated by my co-workers?or Do I join the conversation so that I fit in? ,but since you already have the job and you want to fit in you obviously would choose to join the haters club.See, we all need acceptance by something/someone who appreciates the rules and regulations we live by .This what a hater’s mainly seeks out of hatred.
3.Pride
The word pride clearly doesn’t refer to gaining pride from other people, it’s more likely that the person who hates on someone tends to gain pride by them towards their own self. In other words, it’s simply an act of boosting their self-esteem. researches show that, this is mainly seen in a scenario where newbie joins “the group”. Contemporary thinker Rene Girard describes this in detail when he explains his theory on the nature of scapegoating. When an individual in the group or the whole group together feel tension and when they don’t know how to deal with it, they choose the scapegoat to express their hatred. Once the tension is over the rest of the group feels united, powerful until the next time the tension rises. The is known to be a pattern in a lot of haters/groups that hate on others.By,doing this they can prove to themselves that they have pride inside the group and in the same time they can ensure that they are accepted in the group.
4.Depression
A hater is never a motivator nor is he/she is a happy person. Imagine having one of those “worst day’s ever”. If you recall that memory ,you would remember all the hatred that you spread on other people just because you had a gloomy day. Maybe you said bad words, maybe you fired someone from work, if you’re someone violent you probably would’ve got in to a fight with some stranger. This is natural. It’s human nature.Not everyday goes as planned .We fail at some points in life
Likewise a hater never hates with a happy smile. Some of this hate is personal. Mostly it’s because they are depressed or anxious about something/someone. Like all the other unhealthy thoughts this one is also developed under personal feelings.
Again,just because you have these emotions,you cannot pass them on to another person.It’s a very unhealthy move and ruins your reputation
So how can we prevent hatred as a hater and as a victim
for haters
Words are powerful but according to the points mentioned above hatred is common.Emotions mainly turn us in to haters so here are somethings you could do to prevent hatred if you are personally having a rough day
- be concerned of what you do on bad days
- always think twice
- Know that bad days don’t last forever, everything going to be alright
- Know that spreading hate doesn’t make your statement correct, it just decreases the quality of your image
for victims
Now this is mostly half of the people on social media,which again means most of us.It’s not easy to be strong around haters,but I’m asking you to try. As a victim,
- if you are doing something right, don’t fear hate trust your gut
- pity haters because they are people who are unable to control their emotions
- know that bad days always go away. Hatred is never permanent
- You should know that hatred is easy to notice, because it cause pain. So try your best to ignore hatred as much as possible .When you view it from another perspective sometimes it isn’t directly meant for you(but it doesn’t give the right for anyone to hate)
Last but not least, I want to share with you a quote that dragged my attention,
If you’re mad at one person talk to them,but if you’re mad at a bunch of people talk to yourself
See,I don’t support hate, not at all.But what I want you to take out of the hater’s pen is that hate is a sometimes an emotion and don’t let it drag you down because as I said the hate might be personal and even if it is not,hold on to the majority of people who encourages you and ignore that one individual that spread the hate.
