College & Anxiety

I know I’ve spoken about this topic a few times via Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter & even YouTube, but I feel like this is a HUGE topic that needs to be discussed on as many platforms possible so here I am today.

Mental health is very important to me as a person, but it is also something that I try my best to watch out in others not only family and friends but even complete strangers. I just personally knows how much is sucks to hit rock bottom and be completely alone with no one to confide in. So what is my story and how am I here today to talk to you about this subject?

Well it all started my senior year of high school. I felt I was the typical student. I had friends, we did things together, I made okay grades nothing over the top, but nothing too crazy. As it came time to apply to schools I really didn’t think too far into my future and what I wanted to do. I just knew I wanted to swim and that’s what I set my eyes on. I contacted many coaches and only heard from a handful, and one day I got a email from a coach that was reaching out to me about a school in West Virginia, he said that he was fairly new and wanted to build the program up and asked would I like to be apart of that. I said yes, keep in mind I had no tour of the campus, I never heard of the campus, nor did I even remember WV was a state. So I applied got accepted and fast forward.

So I get on campus for freshman move in day. Say bye to my family and go in my room. I chose to walk around campus to just see if I could meet people, but everyone seemed to already be in their respective clicks so I just went back to my room. One thing I noticed as I walked around was how tiny the campus was. It didn’t even feel like I college. Keep in mind I came from a highschool with almost 6,000 people with 894 people in my graduating class. I wasn’t used to a atmosphere like this at all and from the jump I felt suffocated.

The next day we had to wake up early to travel around 2–3 hours away for our freshman excursion to this little amusement park. We had all been split into groups based off what we chose to do on move in day. I as a swimmer chose to go white water rafting, which was fun. I met people and got to experience nature in a way I’ve never seen it before. That day was great and truly unforgettable. After that we travelled back to the main part of the park where we met up with everyone else, ate and just got to relax or go into the lake on various water activities. I chose to sit and try to communicate with people, I met a few new faces, but not many. We ended up leaving at around 7–8pm travelled back to campus, showered, got dressed, and then went to another activity on campus. Long story short I didn’t meet any new friends.

So basically for the longest I would just eat, practice and go to my room. Up until two weeks after being there that I decided to quit the swim team to focus on my classes. The scheduling just seemed really tough to try to balance with school so I had to let it go. After I stopped swimming everything went down hill; after all I did go there to swim and I just gave it up. My grades started to slack, I stopped going to class, at this time I had friends and I started to party more. It was fun and a huge stress relief. It made me forget all of my issues and I could just be free and smile, it was really amazing how much little fun helped me. But each time I’d seem to sink right back into that dark place come Monday. This would continue for 1 1/2 years until I finally had a mental break down and couldn’t take anymore of anything to do with WV. I packed a week before finals and asked my grandfather to come get me. Yes I bombed finals and left, I didn’t care, I just wanted to be home.

Once I got home I started to work and really start to find myself. I didn’t a lot of reading and watched a lot of motivational speakers and people who were psychologist and counselor’s talk about college and how mental health seems to target more and more college students as time progresses on. I talked to my mom, my grandmother, my grandfather, and a lot of my friends and came to the conclusion that I needed to chase my dreams. So I did! I started taking classes again, I changed my major, I applied to tons of schools(after I researched them.) I was lucky enough to get accepted into a junior college in West Texas and here I am today. So what is my advice to you as students. What helped me succeed and overcome a dark time in my life?

1. My circle- not saying that you can’t be friendly with everyone, but just make sure the people you’re immediately surrounded by are driven by wanting to be successful. Make sure your friends put schooling and work before play. Also make sure you surround yourself with those who want the best for you and will tell you how it is rather than put you in messed up situations.
2. Eating habits- one thing I’ve noticed is that what I put into my body has a huge effect on how my mood is. Not saying that you can’t have junk foods and etc. but make sure you watch what you eat and drink a lot of water because it really helps!
3. Working out- I’ve noticed that when I work out I feel better about myself. It gives me something to be distracted by rather than the urge to go party. Also I’ve started to see my body changing and I’m falling in love with myself. It honestly just boosts my mood x100.
4. Getting involved- go out and join campus activities, join clubs, make friends and be social. Your tuition pays for these campus events so why not go pop up at a few every so often. Take a break sometimes and network, you never know who you might meet.
5. Research, Research, Research- don’t be like me pleaseX1000 research where you’re going to school at. Pull up a map and see what’s around your campus, try to make a trip to that campus and get a tour. There is nothing wrong with trying to find students that attend that College/University and asking them how they like it and get a students prospective.
6. Stay motivated- if you’re like me you probably need that extra dose of motivation. So try to keep a wall calendar and count down the days until the end of the semester or until coming up breaks and etc. Make a wall of motivational daily quotes, enough to grab one a day until the end of the semester. Remember you got this!

I hope this really does help someone. If you have any questions please to be afraid to message me on here or via social media.

• Instagram: uglyblackboi
• Snapchat: Xcvii.Tae
• Twitter: TaeLuxx

Thanks guys. 💙 Don’t forget to give me a BIG 👏!