The Vending Machine Theory

On why guys can’t just be friends after a breakup

Think of it like a vending machine. You out something specific in to get something specific out. This represents the 50/50 in a relationship. You put in your half and they put in theirs and all is good.

But what happens when that vending machine stops giving you what you want? Maybe it just eats up your money or it keeps giving you something else. Would you still go to that vending machine?

Now let’s apply this to human relationships. Your boyfriend puts in his effort in and gets what he wants out because you are his girl friend. But when you suddenly break it off with him and you still want to remain friends, you aren’t giving him what he wants. His efforts are to make you his girl friend while your response are to make him your friend.

He asked for a sweet Hershey’s bar and you gave him a Crunch instead.

Now what does a normal person do? Goes to a vending machine that isn’t gonna eat up his money and gives him what he wants. You are eating up his efforts and you’re not giving him what he wants.

But there’s also different kinds of people.

Some people go to a vending machine just looking for something to eat. Maybe they want that Hershey’s but they’ll settle for a Crunch. They aren’t looking for something specific but rather just something to treat their appetite.

This is how some guys approach women. They are looking for a relationship but they wouldn’t mind a friendship. They are just looking for something fun in their life and someone who can add a sweet touch.

So for some people your vending machine has everything they like in it. And even if you don’t always give them what they want, they’ll keep coming back because you don’t disappoint them.

But there is always going to be that one guy who won’t eat anything but Hershey’s.

This was originally posted as answer on Quora.