My Promise Kept

This is it! The picture that spoke a thousand words to me. There are some pictures that just getcha, this is one of mine. This picture was taken 10 weeks after my daughter was born and just days before I chose to go all in and committed myself to a healthy living journey that 15 years later I am still on today.
Now, I realize most people looking at me in the picture aren’t thinking fat, unhealthy chick, they are thinking new mom with baby weight, or even better, hopefully, just new mom with adorable baby. But that lady in the picture had been taking “eating for two” to heart ever since the birth of her first child and hadn’t stopped even though baby number two was sitting in her lap. This new baby wasn’t all to blame for the incredible weight gain-the daily orange sherbert coolers helped too. But at 5 foot 2 ½ and 40 plus pounds overweight (I had lost 10 since the birth), the small frame of my 34 year old body couldn’t handle the stress the extra pounds were putting on my back, despite being under chiropractic care.
From the time I was 18 years old I had been suffering from herniated discs in my lower back which were exacerbated with the 50 pound pregnancy weight gain I had put on with my son a few years earlier and from carrying him on my hip everywhere. I wanted to get pregnant again but still had 20 pounds on me from the last time. I was talking about wanting to have another baby with the medical doctor who was helping me with my back. He told me with my back issues and already being overweight that I shouldn’t get pregnant because I would have even more troubles. That was not what I wanted or expected to hear and I wasn’t having any part of that conclusion and within 3 months was pregnant.
And it was hard. I had a very active 3 year old to run around after and between my big belly and my back pain and my choice not to take any pain medications during this time, including over the counter meds, there were some not so good days. I pushed myself and my husband definitely picked up my slack around the house, but at 6.5 months pregnant, after a week of travelling to my brother’s wedding out of state and some subsequent stressful events that week, my body had enough. I started to go into early labor and was put on bed rest for what was supposed to be over two months(turned out to be 6 ½ weeks).
Bed rest, extra pounds and back pain is a deadly combo. Lying in bed ALL THE TIME was very uncomfortable. On top of the pain, I was so fearful that I might lose my baby girl. I remember just talking to her making deals and promises with her that if she just stayed put a little longer I would be the best mom ever and take care of myself and take care of her.
After her birth I started seeing the chiropractor, no joke, 3 times a week, sometimes twice in one day. I was nursing and still didn’t want to take any medications. Also, I had never been a medicine person until my back got so bad, so finding natural alternatives was important to me. The chiropractor would meet me at my car and carry in the car seat because I couldn’t. I remember sitting in his office, a week before this picture was taken, crying asking him if this was what my life was going to be like always. My mother had suffered with her back my whole childhood, including having 2 metal rods in her spine which ended up being a failed surgery. Her back limited her at times like mine was now doing. I was scared. He mentioned trying Pilates and as they say, the rest is history.
Pilates was the spark I needed to get my act together and Weight Watchers was the catalyst to losing the weight finally so that I could be that healthy mom that I promised my little girl I would be. In fact, less than a week from seeing this picture for the first time, my journey to becoming healthy and fit, physically and mentally began.
It was a long and winding road but Pilates made me feel strong, stronger than I ever had. It built up my confidence with every successful new move I achieved that I never thought my body would allow me to do. I would leave the studio feeling like I was Wonder Woman. I lost my weight within 8 months and became a Weight Watchers leader for the next 3 years. From there I knew I had to give back and I became a Pilates instructor and Certified Health Coach and opened my own wellness for women studio. At the studio I focused on helping women achieve whole body wellness, what I had achieved when I committed to moving my body every day in some way and making healthy food choices. We all began living happy, healthy and most days, pain free lives.
Now as a Certified Midlife Woman’s Health Coach, I am known as the Midlife Mojo Master. I have entered my own middle age years and have struggled with weight and pain again and have added on new ways of taking care of myself, including intermittent fasting and essential oils.
My baby is now a smart, creative, healthy, beautiful, (almost) woman. I will take some credit. She’s only known the healthy version of me and I am so proud when I see the healthy choices she makes all the time. I may embarrass her at times when she is the only kid at camp sent with essential oils instead of Pepto Bismol or as part of my mission to help midlife women I talk about menopause to the world and her friends tease her, but I did what I told her I would do all those years ago waiting for her arrival. I fulfilled my promise, became the best version of myself I could be and I have tried to be the best mom I can be too. I will take our close relationship as a sign that I did good.

I wish I could go back in time and talk with that scared lady in that picture from 15 years ago. I would give her a great big hug and let her know it would all be OK. That her pain would get better and she would shed the physical and emotional weight. I would tell her one day she would run a 5K, take her son ziplining and trek all over the streets of Rome looking for the perfect pair of shoes. I woud tell her that she should be proud of herself because SHE made it happen, with her effort, commitment and love of her children.