This is first a podcast episode that you can listen to on the Uncomfortable Truths Podcast

[Podcast Intro Sound]

Hey, you ugly blackbird! Welcome back to the Uncomfortable Truths podcast and in this episode, we’re going to be discussing how you can live that miserable life you’ve always wanted. I mean you’ve been told severally, preached at even on happy to live a happy and fulfilling life but for reasons best known to you, you’ve decided not to. So in this episode, I’m going to give you the ultimate guide on how to live that miserable life.

But first, before we jump into the episode, if you’re enjoying the podcast, please subscribe to the podcast, give us a 5-star rating on whatever platform you’re listening on, leave a review, and follow the show on Instagram @uncomfortabletruthspodcast_. If you would love to be a part of the conversations we engage in, then follow the podcast on Twitter @UTWDPodcast. Ensure to share the episode with someone as this helps the podcast grow organically.

Please note that this podcast is not for the faint of heart. The listener’s discretion is advised! Listen at your peril.

So here we go, the ultimate guide on how to live a completely miserable life.

• Focus on the Negative — Always: You know how you’ve always been told that there’s good in every bad situation that occurs, you’re always hearing “if life gives you lemons, make a lemonade” and most of all, it can be daunting trying to fight the negative every single time. Instead, you should never listen toall those quotes and motivational shit people tell you. Instead, you should avoid noticing good things and focus on every single damn negative thing in your life! Who says complaining is bad? Must you always listen to them? The truth is it’s far easier to focus on the negative than the positive. So have at it! Why every bothers to see the bright side of things?
• Keep making excuses and never take responsibility for anything in your life, much less for those around you. Look you should live your life by this quote “If you did not break it, then it isn’t your responsibility to fix it”. The economic breakdown, the degradation of society, lack of jobs, health care, poor standard educational system, how is all that your fault? Did you ever get to choose your family? Location? Status? Why should you ever have to get up and take charge, why do you have to get up and take the necessary steps to improve your own life? After all, where did you consult before you were birthed into this world? If you had, I’m sure you would have chosen a place like the US, UK, Holland, Canada, or France, I mean it would have been an economy to your liking, a family to your liking, probably one that has status and wealth. Never work hard to improve your life or get better. Just keep blaming everyone around you for your predicaments. They are the cause of it all. Your family! The Government! Economy! You name it. Were they ever of your choosing?
• And thirdly, why should you ever change? Refuse to change! Keep doing the same thing repeatedly, and you will keep getting better and better results! A different result! Whoever it was that said “Doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result is an insanity” must have been bat shit crazy!
• Never set realistic goals for yourself! This is the worst thing you could ever do. If you do this, you can never achieve being miserable and that negates everything we’ve been talking about, doesn’t it? Forget about those SMART goals always talked about that try to outline a roadmap to success for you.
• If you ever really want to be miserable, then you have to do this one. Develop Insomnia! Trust me! This reduces your motivation, increases your risk of depression, impaired ability to concentrate, poor memory, difficulty coping with minor irritations, and decreased ability to enjoy family and social relationships. Wait!!!!! There are some extras too! Oh boy, would you love this! Reduced quality of life, often preceding or associated with depression and anxiety.
• Be unhealthy and stay glued to your tv screen. Eat junk food and sit on the couch and watch those freaking TV shows, anime, and the likes! And oh yes don’t forget the Korean dramas. Those are just the gem of it all! You can even start mimicking it all. Ruin your physical health so that you can ruin your mental health. Smoke cigarettes, eat fatty foods and die ahead of schedule.
• I love this next one. Stay in your comfort zone. Look trying new things or challenging yourself is for happy people. Not for the likes of you who want to be miserable. Never try anything that makes you remotely uncomfortable just because it could make you happier or improve your life. You want to be miserable so like I said earlier, refuse to change. Stick with what’s comfortable for you all the time.
• Lastly, you just have to love and cherish misery above all else. Misery is your ally, so actively seek out new ways of being miserable every single day

Can this ultimate guide get any better! If some reason you choose to say not to be miserable then just do completely the opposite of what I’ve listed out here