This post, like the other critiques you cite, is a good start. However, I think you’re not quite taking your own advice. I already thought for myself. I did ask questions. I did disagree. Reasonably.
Given everything you acknowledge above… what do you think happens to people who can’t easily lay claim to one of the more fashionable marginalized identities? Their words get misrepresented and misquoted in the worst possible way, and that’s how you get to people who don’t qualify nevertheless being labeled “virulently misogynist/racist/transphobic/ableist”.
How many anti-SJWs do you think are socially and economically left leaning? I suspect many more than you’d like to admit. How many tried to say the things you just did, but weren’t allowed to, because they’d been pre-emptively unpersoned?
The first step, IMO, is to realize that moving away from the current left orthodoxy doesn’t mean taking a “long, sliding step to the right”. If I’m not allowed to do that, because I’m a “white dude”, that looks like plain old racism and sexism from pretty much every conceivable angle, and no amount of intersectionalism can paper over that.
If you really want to challenge your norms, go visit one of those subreddits you say are “masturbatory”. It’s my experience they are mostly demonized from afar, by people who refuse to engage with the people there. They allow dissenting voices, they respect good argumentation, and they operate in good faith. This is a marked difference from the orthodox ones, where merely having participated in a bad place bans you from being able to speak.