Do You Really Love Me?

How can you say you love when you disappear when I need you the most?

You talk all this shit about how I need a good and loving partner.

A ride or die to sit next to me during the drive.

Ride over my hills and through my valleys.

But you don’t even call me.

All I get are the sometimes good morning and good night messages.

I’m not looking for a man to smother me, but it would be nice to get some consistent love.

The kind that doesn’t show itself when it’s convenient.

The kind that will wrap me in its arms like a woolly sweater on an early winter morning.

How can you say you love me when all you do is make me feel invisible?

You make me feel like the nights I stayed up until 3 am until you finally fell asleep, meant nothing.

These feelings are so familiar to me.

I swore I’d never put myself through this again.

Late nights staring at the phone waiting for you to say hello and ask me how I’m doing.

Wondering where you are, who you’re with and why the conversation with them is so intriguing that you forget I even exist.

I want to say fuck it, block your number, and move on but I have too many questions.

Questions about us.

About our love from beginning to end.

I wish I could tell you how I feel, but I already know the script.

You’ll say you’re sorry, and that you’ll never do it again.

Then 6 days later, you’ll do it again and forget all about the last time.

How can you…

How can you say you love me?

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P.S. My new ebook Relationship Affirmations for Black Women is now on sale. This ebook of relationship affirmations is for black millennial women to help us remember not to accept anything less than the kind of love we truly deserve. You get the ebook and the audio download. Click here and head on over to da shop so you can grab your copy. Thank in advance for the support Sis!

P.P.S. If you’d like to stay in touch, follow me on the blog at www.unorthodoxpoetess.blogspot.com, or just @unorthodoxpoetess on your fav social media platforms.

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