Female Leadership: When Women Mentor Other Women
First posted here
It used to be a running joke many moons ago when I was a young employee right out of school that if you had a female boss, you were ruined. This was supposed to be especially true for women employees. For the longest time, I believed this to be true only of India. Not only was this view an open-secret in all countries I’ve lived in, it felt true at times. All this changed naturally, when I interacted with amazing women who continue to make me feel inspired, and challenge the narrow stereotypical views that I even laughed at, as a young associate, sadly against my own gender. How does female leadership get such bad rep? Can anything be done to make it supportive rather than a secret joke?
The bad rep generated solely by female leadership
1. Many of these jokes were created by men: Why do we not hear jokes about men as leaders? It’s impossible that all men have Einstein’s IQ or Dalai Lama’s empathy. Many men have assumed leadership roles merely because they could. Some just got lucky despite their incompetence as leaders. So why don’t we hear more about men being poor leaders for men? Why is this solely a women-only category? Some of them were created by men. Women were equally responsible for brushing them aside, or worse still, believing them.
2. Where are the strong female mentors? Here’s a quote from Forbes, that’s very hard hitting.
Youngsters entering business and the professions have been looking ahead at their peers for forty or so years now and here’s what they see. One woman. Maybe two. They’re often childless and sometimes they have spouses who have taken on the female role of child and house-tending in a way that, let’s be frank, doesn’t float most women’s boat.
As a minority, being able to see people who look and talk like you, is essential to give you an inspired boost that you’re on the right track too. You can imagine things are possible when you see the potential come to fruition through someone else that you can relate to. Hello- Gal Gadot, Wonder Woman. But not so far back in time, women could only be secretaries, teachers, mothers, and one man armies doing everything. All ambitious women were considered bossy, unfit to be marriageable (because they had an opinion and success) or taken as ‘one of the boys.’
Women worked really hard to be seen as a part of the boys gang creating disadvantages and unusual barriers for their own kind.
3. Workplace Bullying is Real: It has happened again and again, and I have not found a magic potion to resolve the mean girl syndrome. Often insecure women get passive-aggressive in their fight to be the (men or women) boss’s favorite. These girls may wear the girl power t-shirts but do not quite live the principals. We’ve all met them, from middle school through to college and in workplaces. Not to say that only women can be bullies, but women bullying other women is particularly bothersome. In some ways it reminds me of old mother-in-law stereotypes from Hindi movies, where women propagated the patriarchy themselves.
Women Mentoring Women
I feel like the more inspiring women we meet, the more inspired we feel as future leaders. Mentorship is a two-way relationship. It can only foster more growth on both sides. Women supporting each other and being role models helps both find a path that’s rewarding and meaningful. Here’s a Meet Up group that I hope to work on to get to meet these wonderful, amazing women who will inspire!
Come by, and share your stories!
Please hit ❤ if you like this story, so that we can reach more women around the world as a part of this mentorship community!