Thoughts at the end of my #womensmonth series

Urbanjodi
Urbanjodi
Aug 31, 2018 · 3 min read

For this women’s month I posted a number of “tributes” honoring women in my life who inspire and strengthen me through their strength.

It was imperfect, but I did it.

You can find all the posts on #womensmonthinspo on Instagram.

Here are thoughts on the experience:

So it’s the end of #womensmonth and I’ve still got a million more women to honour. Jess-chicken, Jess-Jessi, Stacey, Bridget, Helen, Zimkhita, Sarah-sassy, Kim… so many women near and far who have shown bravery or been a role model in some way.

Here are some thoughts about the process:

I had no predtermined list or order. I’ve definitely left some people out. It wasn’t about “awards” but about the process.

I chose women each day based on who was in my head (apart from a few who I waited for bdays). A different month with different events and different emotions would have a different group.

I couldn’t do it every day. Some days my mind just wasn’t there. But some days I felt like shit and did it anyway and it actually helped. Some days I even made a plan to meet a woman after work, which helped even more.

It was really, really hard to think about each woman and the life she’s lived and the lessons she’s taught me, because with each one there was a trauma or a pain or an exploitation or some barrier they’ve overcome. I tried to sensitively not always name it but also acknowledge it by not just having fluffy-pink-you’re-beautiful shoutouts.

I couldn’t always do it as well as it deserved. It made me an angry, angry feminist on some days. Maybe I should be one every day? Some days I wondered if I have become good at pushing everyone’s pain out of sight just to make non-feminists more comfortable?

I found it hardest to talk about black women and I realised I still have work to do on my intersectionality. Same goes for the trans post.

Feminism /is/ for everybody. That also includes men. There were a few really good feminist men I wanted to post for. Like Muna or Graeme or the men who ask me my opinion like it matters.

This exercise reminded me that women are stronger because of the systems we are part of & a lot of the paired-up or group posts made that clearer to me. I couldn’t honour every individual but I guess the bigger system of strong women was exactly what this series was about.

Feedback I got included a picture of a notepad with some phrases on it — new language taken from some posts. I got a lot of face to face feedback from men saying they didn’t comment on social media but they were appreciating it and learning from it.

During this month I also watched an anti-feminism propaganda “documentary” that gets 8.4 on IMDB and signals a huge uprise in extremely conservative views positioning men as victims of feminism, and calling for a reversal of many of our rights.

I was also called a feminazi — a pejorative term for feminist popularized by right wingers in the USA and used widely on red-pill and incel groups.

During this month, I also watched Nanette. You should too. She also swears a lot and is angry. But you should be too.

    Urbanjodi

    Written by

    Urbanjodi

    Archive of thoughts. Imperfect, incomplete and not assumed to be my final position. My actions speak louder than my words. Learn more: https://jodi.city