The Gaslighting of the Democrats
Resist the Victim-Blaming Brogressive Bullshit
I wish Hillary Clinton WAS the evil supervillain the far right and far left think she is. I wish she did have the power to rig elections and murder her enemies. How fucking amazing would that be? It would make Game of Thrones look like Eat, Pray, Love.
She’s been scaring the shit out of the patriarchy for a long time. We love her for the same reasons they hate her: she’s goddamn brilliant and fearless and formidable and terrifying.
Here is a comprehensive list of reasons why Hillary Clinton lost the electoral college:
- She scared the fuck out of Vladimir Putin.
That’s it. Full stop. The Steele dossier makes it clear that there was only one candidate in the 2016 election who Putin “hated and feared” enough to sabotage…and it sure as shit wasn’t Bernie:
This is how we should always refer to her from now on, forever. As in, “Hillary Clinton, whom Putin hated and feared, was such a badass that it took the combined efforts of the GOP, the FBI and the Kremlin to just barely keep her from her rightful place in the Oval Office.”
There’s an almost Soviet-level effort afoot to rewrite — even erase — the campaign and legacy of Hillary Clinton, whom Putin hated and feared.
This week Vanity Fair unhelpfully decided to spray us all with male anal glands in a piece that would have been better titled “Please, God, Stop Men from Telling Chelsea Clinton What to Do.” The only thing more sickening than bitter Brogressives telling the next generation of female leaders to sit down and shut up is the number of men in my newsfeed who shared the article with comments like, “I loved Hillary, but sadly this is spot-on.”
Really? You loved (past tense) Hillary Clinton, but you don’t want her legacy — which the majority of Americans voted for — to continue? No more dynasties! We hate dynasties! Oh, but that Joe Kennedy III, he’s a rising star, because penis.
There’s also an ongoing attempt to hijack the term “progressive,” and turn it into a litmus test for progressive ideological purity. Also we’re supposed to believe that “the Democrats” — all twelve of them The Hill bothered to ask — “welcome” Bernie’s hijacking of our party. Apparently none of the other 227 Congressional Dems were willing to go on the record with “Fuck this shit-stained douchenozzle.” Which suggests no one was trying very hard to find that angle.
No, we don’t want to join the progressive underground; we’ll keep it above ground, thanks. No, we will not help you tear down the establishment; we want OUR side running the establishment. We don’t want big money out of politics; the other side’s coffers are overflowing with oil subsidies and NRA blood money. Our side already spends less, and spends better.
Love doesn’t win elections. Know what does? A fuckton of hard work and money. We need both.
Liberals are by definition progressive. “Pro-life pro-choice” is a mindfuck oxymoron designed to insinuate the forced-birthers’ rhetoric into our platform. Don’t fall for any of it.Racial justice. Economic reform. Worker protections. Public health and safety. LGBT rights. Environmental ethics. Gender equality. Immigration and human rights. They’re not separate issues. Somebody’s got to be the party that stands for what’s right goddammit, and it’ll have to be us. We don’t go backward. Ever.
The resistance has to happen on the ground…but even more than that, it needs to be in our minds. That’s where the real battle is being fought.
George Orwell’s 1984 explains a concept called doublethink, which is “the power of holding two contradictory beliefs in one’s mind simultaneously, and accepting both of them.” You know, kind of like the 2016 Democratic platform was too progressive, but also not progressive enough. Or that a crusty old white Wall Street cuck who loves guns and views women and people of color as expendable commodities is somehow going to “move the party left.” Or how eight years should’ve been more than enough time to undo 300 years of systemic racism, and we failed at that, so obviously we should’ve gone for the more realistic goal of overthrowing our market-based economy to usher in the socialist revolution, also in eight years.
The next time a mansplaining Penis Truther tries to argue that we can’t possibly run a woman candidate in 2020, remind him that this is not, in fact, how progress gets made. You know who told us to “keep fighting — America is worth it”? Hillary Clinton, whom Putin hated and feared.
Whenever you encounter horseshit about how the Democratic party needs to move past all these trivial distractions, like treating women as sentient beings in control of their own lives, or not losing 100,000 Americans to gun violence every fucking year, you can chime in with “Yeah! Come to think of it, maybe Asian-American internment camps weren’t such a bad idea after all. Free room and board, fun activities, and they all get to be together speaking their Chinese or Japanese or whatever.”
Because this is how it sounds.
You know who wouldn’t want us to fuck up a hundred years of progress? Hillary goddamn Clinton, whom Putin hated and feared.
Here are a few more responses to add to your bullshit-fighting arsenal:
“The Dems are divided, having an identity crisis, imploding, etc.” Actually, the Dems are just fine. We’re the majority, after all. And, given the full-throated pushback we’re giving both Trump and the Perez/Sanders live sex show, we look pretty fucking unified to me.
What we’re doing is cleaning house. You know, like the GOP should have done with the Tea Party in 2008. Or, better yet, the Moral Majority in the 1980s. What happens when you don’t take out the trash periodically? Take a look at what the party of Eisenhower has turned into if you want an answer.
“Clinton was a weak candidate who ran a weak campaign.” Yep, so weak she got 2.8 million votes more than Trump. The popular vote isn’t a participation trophy. It fucking matters. A weak candidate wouldn’t have gotten that margin, let alone after decades of attacks from the GOP, the FBI, divisive third partiers and ingrained cultural misogyny. A weak candidate wouldn’t have kept Vladimir Putin awake at night.
Even Nate Silver (who contributed his small share of damage with his fawning over Sanders) acknowledges that “Clinton’s ground game advantage over Trump may have been as large as the one Obama had over Mitt Romney in 2012. It just wasn’t enough to save the Electoral College for her.”
“She was ‘too negative.’” Call me a crony capitalist liberal elitist corporate shill, but I just don’t think “Donald Trump is a dangerously incompetent maniac” is a bad message. This is like saying you find Gordon Ramsay an abrasive dinner companion, so you’re gonna go eat at Hannibal Lecter’s place instead.
“The DNC cheated!” It takes a special kind of idiocy to believe the DNC did not remember to rig the 2008 primary, but did remember to rig the 2016 primary by 3.7 million votes, but OH SHIT, somehow couldn’t manage to scrape up 80,000 votes in Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania. Alse the DNC doesn’t run the primaries — those are up the states.
And my personal favorite:
“Bernie woulda won!” Imagine that two athletes try out for the U.S. Olympic team. One beats the other’s score by a 10% margin and gets to go to the games, where her roided-out opponents trip her just before the finish line. Only insane troll logic would insist that the less-qualified guy would’ve gone home with the gold.
Sanders, who admitted he lost the primary “fair and square” and who got his ass kicked in the South, would have been torn to shreds once the GOP’s smear machine got to work airing his own mountainous dirty laundry.
Almost a year ago, Talking Points Memo noted that Trump’s campaign was “trying to sow discord among the Democrats, and … attract support from Sanders’ supporters.” But it didn’t work as planned. Know why?
Holy shit, look at that. We resisted, AND IT WORKED. We changed the course of a key part of Putin’s plan, without even knowing it! That plan depended — and depends — on the ignorance and gullibility of both Trumpers and Bernouts. When we call them out on their shit, IT FUCKING WORKS.
We outnumber them. When we raise our voices, we win. We have to outshout them. We HAVE to. No hiding in secret groups, no running away from confrontation. You know who doesn’t cower from trolls and haters? Hillary motherfucking Clinton, whom Putin hated and feared.
“Such language!” Anger and naughty words, oh no! If you’re more upset swearing than by fascism, misogyny and treason, then realign your fucking priorities, bitch.
Fuck this high road bullshit. Get louder. Get nastier. And don’t smile unless you fucking feel like it.
See you on the low road.
Val Perry Rendel’s forthcoming book, Bust: Bernie’s 30-Year Plan to Destroy the Democrats, will be available this summer on Amazon.com. “Like” her Author page on Facebook and follow her on the Twitter: @WorstPrezEver29