A Writer’s Apologia

On loving a writer

1.

Although I love you, I may not see you for hours or days or weeks, even if we live or work together.

2.

When writing, my inbox and voice messages pile up around me until I forget that they are there. My intention is to get to them, but in all probability, they will be lost. I appreciate your efforts to send me repeated messages. I do not see these as nagging reminders. I see them as the effort of someone who understands that five reminders for a lunch date or an email every day until you get an answer, are not annoying—they are necessary.

3.

If I do answer the phone when you call, I will be brief or sound crabby. The fact that I have answered the phone rather than let it go into voice mail signals that I am either: a.) on a bathroom break, b.) procrastinating, c.) stuck on a challenging part, d.) cleaning, or e.) eating. I will be cranky if interrupted doing any of those things. Please do not take it personally. I am anxious to get back to work.

4.

I forget real-world details, like birthdays or plans made. I can be tremendously organized with charts of plot and sketches of characters taped on the wall or to my computer, but things like dentist appointments or lunch plans may be forgotten unless…