Vandita Manyam
Aug 9, 2017 · 4 min read

It’s Scary, but lets face it

What are you scared about? Well, according to Google, the top 5 phobias are spiders, snakes, height, crowded spaces and fear of dogs. However, based on my observations, through the help of my surrounds and acquaintances, I have a different top 5, uncertainty, rejection, public speaking, change and unfamiliarity.

Everyone wants to strive for perfection and if they don’t meet perfection, they fear that they aren’t good enough.

Past reasons of fear

Why? Is everyone an engineer or a doctor? Do you have to have a paper to prove you’re smart? Are dropouts not successful?

Let’s switch back to the past for a little bit. It was in the 1980s, when computers became popular, yes thats 40 years ago. ONLY 40 years ago. TVs and cellphones became available to the vast majority in 1990s. Honestly, 20 years ago is when inventors of various technologies were actually accepted by many people. They spent about 15 years of persistence in believing in themselves by conquering fear. If these inventors and creators feared that the products they created would eventually be rejected, we wouldn’t have comfort and entertainment we do today.

On a realistic scale, fear makes sense. Our ancestors were scared of large predators and for survival. The sense of fear was effective for them. It helped in keeping them away from dangerous situations.

Reasons for fear right now — its us, we humans

However, now that we are naturally distant from large predators, our fears often hold us back, keeping us from moving forward.

You see, the fears over the last couple years, in my perspective are less about large predators such as animals and have become more about small circumstances such as situations in life.

In our current world today, many of us hear terms such as data, patterns and predications based on old events. So, why don’t we use the data from our ancestors and the great inventors of our time to help us redirect our fears, in terms of motivation.

Few Reasons…

1Fear means that something important is about to happen. You only fear things that scare you, and you only get scared because it really matters. In all, you usually fear things that are important and need your attention.

2 Fear causes you to act upon certain situations or things. Here, I’m using act, as one taking action of a situation by confronting, not avoiding. In other ways, talking about how one needs to change in order to move past the fear.

3 Fear is a signal of growth. Embracing fear, means you embrace growth. It is another signal of constant growth and change, that you are learning everyday. Learning how to feel the free and let lose to accept it aways, only makes you happier, because you know you tried. You become more capable and have many stories to tell.

4 Make fear your best friend. Fear happens, and thats that. Life is scary, its uncertain, and crazy things happen all the time. You still love your best friends even if they do things you can’t tolerate. You don’t run away. Similar, fears help you come to terms with things, so get to know your fears. Take your fear out for coffee or dessert, get to know it and find out where it came from. You don’t have to love everything about it, but try to understand, it will do you good.

I am not trying to convince you that fear is good. But heres the thing, when we are 70 years, you want to be able to share your fun stories with everyone, especially the ones closest to you. You want to share all the college experiences, skydiving, traveling, falling in love, break ups, moving to a new city, falling flat on your face, getting your first job and so forth.

Fear can be devastating, or it can be motivating. We can continue to ignore our fears, and allow it to hold us back, forever. Or we can confront fear, and face it, for personal growth. Confronting fear helps us gain become more capable of overcoming situations than we possible ever could have imagined.

Make friends with your fear, I promise you, you will be filled with lifetime worth of stories later on.


If you enjoyed the read, please recommend and share to help others find it! Feel free to leave a comment below.

Vandita Manyam

Written by

blogger | product person | lets build things for the future

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade