My Dog’s 10 Favorite Activities

Vanessa Armstrong
Mar 22, 2018 · 1 min read

1. Fart and sneeze at the same time.

2. Fart and scamper across the room, startled by the noise the fart made.

3. Fart, lick butt.

4. Lick butt, fart.

5. Raise ears skeptically when owner farts but tells her boyfriend that the dog was the one that farted.

6. In protest of false farting accusation, stare at owner and fart (loudly) without breaking eye contact.

7. Sniff dog and human pee splattered all over the sidewalk, making sure to fart between each sniff.

8. Eat food. Fart. Eat more food.

9. Eat poop. Fart and/or have diarrhea.

10. Poop, then fart. Then poop some more.

Vanessa Armstrong

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I write things. Yay! On twitter as @vfarmstrong. I also have a website: vfarmstrong.com