My friend asked me “ What can I do to stop turning 20?”. It came as a surprise to me considering she is someone who enjoys life . This question might just seem more usual than we’d like to think.
So then we ask “ What causes such a change “ . Is it the fear of taking up responsibilities and living up to expectations? Is it the fear of future uncertainty? Fear of death? Above all, and the most valuable question asked should be “ How do I look at growing up and what should I look forward to?
So I ask myself this. How comfortable am I knowing that the future is uncertain and death is inevitable?
I’m very well aware that no matter the amount of energy I devote to plan and secure my future, there is still going to be an element of surprise waiting for me. Reason being we all live co-dependently. Other’s action will have a impact on me and that is going to put off my plans . So it brings me to the question : Do I have the resources to deal with these situations?
I most certainly do. I say it with confidence because I’ve got this far and I didn’t even conciously plan my future. I went with the flow. Albeit, going with the flow isn’t practical as we grow older, but we can assure ourselves that there will be circumstances in life which are out of our control. That will help us in renewing and upgrading our spent energy .
To know that even when the future is uncertain, I have methods to face it, can be very powerful.
My second dilemma “ How comfortable am I knowing that death is inevitable? “
I am here on a deadline. Just as most of us. We like to sugar coat it by saying “ Life is short, so live it while you can “. It’s true, life is short. However, not all of us can explicitly enjoy the joys of life. So what will keep us going?
For some of us is the anticipation of where will our choices lead us. Who will we meet along the way and who is that one special person with who we’ll have our first times? What kind of an empire will we leave behind?
Growing older is an opportunity to tackle life and along with it its problems. To fight for yourself. To empower yourself. It’s not the end goal, but the journey that is breathtaking. Once the goal is attained, it will loose it’s sweetness but the memory will keep us motivated to try out more.
For me, I want the sensation of new and fresh feelings. It could be the touch of a book, the sound of a new instrument, the presence of someone special , the trepidation at taking a risk, the feel of someone’s lips on me, of making a friend, of seeing landscapes of different countries, the job I will get tired of and change, hearing the sound of my child calling out my name, my grandchildren huddled around the fire , patiently listening to my childhood and my notorious adulthood anecdotes.
Truth is, because we can’t predict the future we chose not to look forward to it positively. Future is like a buried treasure and the key to opening it is patiently following the map ahead of us and enjoying every bit of our journey.