I feel this 100%. Young me wanted the weirdness and the adventure. 34 year old me looks at my super normal sister with her house and husband and consistent unionized teaching job — and I am jealous. It eats me up and keeps me up at night. Even when I have tried for the normal it has rejected me. People tell me I am strong and they are jealous of my interesting path. But I am coming to realized the stories haven’t been worth it. And now I am here, stuck with this path. But at least we have each other?