Startup to Corporate Jargon Translator
I once participated in a panel discussion hosted by a distinguished media to discuss innovation in Asia startups. Sitting in the audience were mostly white-collar folks from the corporate world.
My fellow panelist, who dressed in his company T-shirt, jeans and sneakers explained how his company grew. Along with his infectious enthusiasm, he exuberantly answered it in bullet-train speed, effortlessly weaving his sentences with startup jargons. It went something like that,
”Our MVP was merely a wireframe we built in a few weeks…We pivoted a couple of times till we finally figured out what our product market fit was. Then our MAU took off...We did a few growth hacks like embedding the share buttons, adding social feature, tweaking our onboarding experience…”
While I tried to digest what he was saying, I turned to the audience— looking even more perplexed than me yet still politely nodding their heads, seemingly impressed by his fluency and confidence. I almost chuckled.
I almost chuckled not because I was making fun of my fellow founder, but only because I was both an offender and a receiver of such language as well. Having worked in a big conglomerate for years, I know well how corporation and their employees notoriously throw buzzwords and acronyms around. If you want to see where corporate lingos flourish, just read their mission statements or public announcement.
Lucy Kellaway’s podcasts from the Financial Times has been one of the most vocal persons to criticize the use of cryptic jargons in business. She has a whole collection called “Guffipedia”. Just recently, Twitter ex-CEO Dick Costello made the honorable Kellaway’s Guffipedia list by saying,
“As we iterate on the logged-out experience and curate topics, events, moments that unfold on the platform, you should absolutely expect us to deliver those experiences across the total audience and that includes logged in users and users in syndication” — Dick Costello, ex-CEO, Twitter
Some of you might say, “what’s wrong with what Costello was saying?” I would suggest you repeat that to your mother and pay attention to her reaction.
Is it ever OK to use jargons?
It is OK that you speak your own language within your group. Using your own jargons within your group indicate certain common understanding among the members. It could strengthen the bonds and even promote camaraderie in the group. It makes communication faster and efficient. I get it — we do that in university clubs, sports teams, military, political parties.
It is somewhat OK to speak other’s jargons within other’s group. That could show you have taken the effort to do research on the other party — provided that you really did understand the terms and did not sound phony.
It is however NOT OK to use your own jargons deliberately while you’re speaking to others who (potentially) won’t understand them. Nor should you think that those words you use are generally understood by everyone else. No excuse — because that behavior conveys ignorance and arrogance. Would you really want your customers to feel being left out, or worse, stupid?
The original PIVOT
My favorite startup jargon is “PIVOT”. I credited this to Kamara Toffolo from the muse for pointing out this funny skid from this episode of “Friends”. Now I can’t stop laughing about it (in my head) when someone mentions this word.
For your amusement, I have tried to decipher some of the commonly heard startup jargons into corporate buzzwords. Here are my top 10 favorites:
I’ve started a google sheet for you to contribute to this list — No sign-in required or you can simply add to the comments below. Feel free to add more and provide alternate translations. Some of them I’ve left blank because I need your help to translate. I promise to publish an updated list when I get enough feedback.
Greatest communicators speak concisely and in an authentic tone. Martin Luther King Jr touched millions of lives because he spoke to the people in the way they resonated with. So did Steve Jobs. Next time when you find yourself wondering if you should use that jargon, do this:
when in doubt, leave it out
