The Power of Acceptance and Authentic Desire
The paradoxical adage “what you resist persists” reveals a profound truth about the nature of our thoughts and how we interact with them. It’s not uncommon to feel trapped in a cycle of resistance, much like a hamster spinning endlessly in its wheel. The more we resist a thought, the more entrenched it becomes in our consciousness, gaining strength from our opposition. This is because resistance focuses our attention on the very thing we wish to avoid, embedding it deeper into our psyche. Consequently, the thought becomes an anchor, dragging us down and influencing our reality.
Consider the case of Alex, a dedicated professional who constantly battled the thought of not being competent enough. Despite his achievements, this fear persisted, growing stronger with each attempt to suppress it. It wasn’t until Alex acknowledged the thought’s presence and its intent to protect him that he could let it pass through without leaving a lasting mark.
When such a negative thought happens again and again, thank your mind for it (it is trying to protect you!), accept to have such a thought and let it peacefully go through you.
Similarly, when we confront our inner critic’s mandates of “I must,” we face an external pressure that weighs heavily upon us. “I must be less shy,” or “I must be more organized,” each “I must” is a burden imposed by external expectations. The shift from “I must” to “I need” is subtle yet powerful. “I need” is a statement of personal understanding and genuine desire. It springs from within, carrying the energy of our true self, rather than the dictates of society.
For instance, Sarah, who always told herself she must be more outgoing, realized that what she needed was to feel comfortable in her own skin. This shift from external obligation to internal recognition transformed her approach to social interactions, making them more genuine and less stressful.
Embracing “I need” instead of “I must” is a practice of self-awareness and authenticity. It encourages a dialogue with our inner selves, uncovering our true desires and needs. By stopping at every “I must” and replacing it with “I need,” we align closer with our core values and aspirations.
In summary, to live a more harmonious life, it is essential to recognize and accept our negative thoughts without resistance and to articulate our desires as authentic needs rather than external compulsions. By doing so, we cultivate a mindset that not only fosters personal growth but also contributes to a more genuine and fulfilling existence.
