Emotional Magazine’s Daily Detox Diary — January 1, 2020

January 1, 2020

For this year, as an editor I am interested in keeping a diary of my emotions and thoughts. It is a challenge to not only write everyday, but to share an authentic and partially planned view of my mind. Something to look forward to at the end of each day for you, and something else that will hold me accountable to journal. I want this be fun and a sort of meditative practice at the end of each day. I will be speaking about a topic that will be heavy on my mind, and discussing the bits that confuse or intrigue me. Enjoy and beware!

Sometimes I think in our effort to grow, we can forget who we actually are. Instead of focusing on what we have, we try to change ourselves into the correct kind of person. Especially when the new year arrives, it’s as though we want to erase ourselves in an effort to become the idealized version of ourselves. I believe that there is a lot of emphasis on forceful change due to the new year. The pressure to do better, be better but for some maybe it’s a year to become comfortable with who you are.

I wanted very badly to write down charts of the things I wanted to change, the moments that I wanted to have next year and so many other things. I had to look into myself and see the person I really am, and what were the reasons I was trying to change myself. I kept seeing that the types of people who were successful all seemed to have the same habits. Was it from laziness or fear that I was not keeping up with those habits? I realized that I was only noticing the end result of my thought processes. These had become so ingrained that no matter how much I wanted to change, if I didn’t start by acknowledging the habits I would get nowhere.

Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.
~ Oscar Wilde ~

You want to lose weight but have you set up a time to figure out why you gained the weight? Are we not to acknowledge the things that got us to the point that we want to change. New Years resolutions, where we feel so much pressure to work on ourselves that we don’t even think about the skills we developed that we want to expand upon.

Instead of focusing on what we lack, and working against time we should think about how we have developed. While we look at the ticking clock of the new year we stress ourselves so greatly to develop into someone different. But how can you grow when you haven’t even acknowledged the things that have rooted before hand?