Embracing Surrender: My Journey

The concept of surrendering to God is beautifully universal and echoed across various religions. It’s a profound act of faith, trust, and humility, yet it’s something I’ve struggled to grasp fully over the years. My soon-to-be ex-wife, however, possessed remarkable wisdom and emotional strength that allowed her to embrace and adopt this principle, especially when facing family issues early in our marriage. Her example stayed with me and influenced my journey toward understanding surrender. Here are the phases I’ve gone through:

1. The Misconception of Weakness: I once believed that weak people surrendered while strong ones controlled their destinies. This perspective made surrender seem like an admission of defeat rather than a gesture of trust.
2. Misguided Surrender: There was a time when I thought surrender meant absolving myself of responsibility, even for negative actions, attributing everything to “God’s will.” This distorted view led to complacency and a lack of personal accountability.
3. External Surrender: I also went through a phase where I believed that surrender meant submitting to external symbols of divinity — temples, scriptures, or spiritual leaders — rather than cultivating an internal connection with God.

A New Understanding of Surrender

I’ve come to realize that these approaches were flawed. True surrender is a multi-step process that requires character and effort to develop. Here’s my revised understanding:

1. Faith in God’s Existence and Nature: The first step is having unwavering faith in God’s existence and his loving, caring, and kind nature. Doubting this foundation disrupts the process of surrender.
2. Divine Relationship and Karma as per His Will: It’s crucial to build a relationship with God, ensuring that your daily actions align with His will. Initially, this may involve guidance from mentors, spiritual leaders, therapists, or religious scriptures. However, with time, meditation reveals God’s voice within you. This inner voice, the conscience, never lies and represents God’s design for us. Sometimes, we ignore this voice, but deep down, it guides us toward what aligns with divine will.
3. Surrender and Equanimity in Outcomes: After aligning your actions with God’s will, you can desire specific outcomes. However, it’s essential to let go of the fear of failure or uncertainty and renew your faith again and again in His nature to be loving, kind, and caring. Remind yourself that you are in his custody and that whatever will happen will be for the eventual good of self and humanity, although you may not see, understand, or accept that from the outcome at the moment. Accept whatever results with humility and equanimity, recognizing them as God’s will and blessing. Even if the outcome differs from your expectations, accepting it as part of a more excellent divine plan is critical to true surrender.
4. Dedication and Gratitude: If the outcome includes material gains — money, fame, recognition — dedicate these to God. Remind yourself that your talents and achievements are blessings from God, who provided the IQ, EQ, and physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual wellness necessary for success. This helps keep the ego in check.
5. Self-Awareness and Growth: Surrender is a journey, and mistakes are inevitable. Self-awareness is crucial for identifying when you try to control outcomes or feel entitled to success. Reflect on these mistakes during meditation, write a journal about them, and ask God for forgiveness and wisdom to improve. Don’t set rigid timelines for perfection. Embrace mistakes as opportunities for growth and feel blessed for your connection with God, trusting that He will guide you to where you need to be.

Surrender is not about relinquishing control or abdicating responsibility. It’s about recognizing that while we can work towards our goals, the ultimate outcome lies in God’s hands. It’s a humble acceptance of life’s events, trusting in a higher power’s wisdom and love, and continuously striving to align our actions with divine will. This journey of surrender is a testament to the strength of character, faith, and a deep, personal relationship with the divine.

Most religions violently agree on this

Hindu: . https://medium.com/@viresh.garg/gita-and-surrender-319dc6b0f81a

Muslim: https://medium.com/@viresh.garg/quran-and-surrender-94f925ec753d

Christianity: https://medium.com/me/stats/post/89ce11ed9d2e