Can we just change the date already ffs — Scott Morrison wants to update the Australian Citizenship Ceremonies Code to enforce “dress standards” and to require local councils to hold citizenship ceremonies on Australia Day. The naked, desperate populism makes me want to vomit — people will hear this and nod along and say yes yes that makes sense…

It is Y19, somehow. — Last year, I wrote my Things down 30 times. (It’s not a competition.) I did it less in the second half of the year because everything got a lot busier with work and work travel and holiday travel, but I haven’t stopped or anything. See? Here I am. It is…

I did a headstand by myself — It’s been a while and I have not written down any Things. That’s partly because Work Reasons – I just haven’t had as much time for Things – and partly due to utter, utter despair. The last Thing I wrote was: “Seems a bit possible that we’ll have a new…

Had we but world enough and time — The magnificent Aretha Franklin died this week. Wesley Morris’s New York Times article about her is very good, and obviously it’s an excellent time to listen to her full back catalog, and watch The Blues Brothers. Due to a quirk of Australian democracy, a senator was elected despite receiving only…

Let bees sting you — There is nothing more pure on the internet this week than the Warrnambool Wombat. Trust me. Complications follow, so if you want to stay clean, stop right here. If only Gywneth Paltrow knew about the wombat, she wouldn’t be going in for jade eggs and suchlike. She showed up at…

It is all an outrage I tell you — My preferred bookstore, Readings in Carlton, has had a very nice renovation that feels both fresh and very familiar, and is much more spacious and flowing (partly because they were finally able to remove the massive concrete that was leftover from the building’s previous life as a Commonwealth Bank branch). …

After holidays, there is nothing to look forward to — This time last week I guess we were somewhere between London and Hong Kong, less than halfway through our 38 hour homeward journey. On Monday, when I got back to work and we were wondering about who might represent the team at a thing in Amsterdam in October, I was…

There are no Things, only 🍕 — I really haven’t read or thought much at all for the last two weeks –pizza and sunshine and a lot of wine have got in the way. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a pure holiday, with no work interruptions or obligations. I think the last one might…

In my defence, I’m 40 now and much slower at everything — Got a bit of a backlog here — two weeks of getting older + travel + so much work + life going on etc. So this is a double episode of Weekend Things. Via Vince, this extraordinary long story of the hundreds of small fuck-ups and decisions that led up…