By Vishal Elias
Home is where the heart is, isn’t that what everyone says. I never understood the concept of what home meant until I got older. Home is the one in place in your life that is always consent figure in your life. Whether it be your childhood house where you were your parents marked the wall to record your height as you got older year by year. Or your grandparents house where you can always be kid no matter what your age truly is. For me, it’s my grandparents’ house back in Bangladesh. I remember the stories that my grandpa used to tell me before we went to bed every night. Home is when your grandmother wakes ups early on Christmas to cook all of the delicious and wonderful treats that the family will devour later that night.
The house stood ten stories tall with palms trees surrounding the base of the building. The sunlight would appear in threw the windows every morning waking me up and I would see my grandparents preparing to start their daily routines. Across front the driveway that extended out to the street, where you could see the student medical hospital where the people came to get better. If you were to talk a walk down the driveway and take a right at the stop sign, you would have been able to see my grandfathers’ restaurant where he would spend most of his day and every night he would bring home a special dish that he had just cooked for me.
Yet for some people home is this abstract ideal that is impossible to attain. For some people there’s no place in the world where they can create a home. Palestinians are some of these people who can say that they do not have a sense of identity. After the Last Sky Palestinians Lives by Edward Said, is a depiction of Palestinian’s whose lives are spent in exile. These people have been kicked out of their own country and forced to become refugees in hopes that one of the neighboring countries will take them in, if any.
‘’They did not exist’’.
Richard Miller introduces the story, The Liars Club a memoir By Mary Karr, relatively towards the end of his novel The Dark Knight of the Soul. It tells of the story of how Mary Karr grew up in her home. Yet the story is not one of happiness but of. Not everyone’s home is a sanctuary, where you are able to be free from abuse and neglect. She was brought up a dysfunctional family, where both of the parents would drink themselves to decay because they lost the love for one another. Even though she had a home, she did not receive the care a home brings.
My grandparents’ house is the place where I was raised as kid. I reminisce in the childhood memories of reclus behavior and the foolish circumstances that I would get into with my cousins. Those were the days when the only job that I had was to be just an innocent kid who roamed his days in joy. I had a comfort and security of a community that would look after one another. Everyone did their job to keep their community thriving and proving a new and better future for the future generations of kids to be grown up here.
At my home it felt good to be safe, to be me without being judged by others. That’s what a home does. It feels you with joy knowing that every night you had a roof over your head while you slept and dreamt of flying with birds of planet Pandora. I remember the day that my when, Max a small black with four u shaped spots on his back rabbit had passed away. I had come home from school; I opened the front door and ran straight to backyard to go play with Max. When I had gotten there I saw my grandfather waiting there to talk to me. He said that Max was in better place now where he will forever eat carrots till the end of time. Even though that was a tragic day for the four year old me, I had learned about death. Even though death is an emotional roller coaster, if you have the love and comfort of a loving a family, you know that you will be able to get through this difficult phase in your life.
A home, is a fully functional, chaotic mess with up and downs but what get you through all the time is the people that you live with to call it a home. Even though they make pull your hair out for no reason, you somehow still figure out how be a family that stays together through the rough times to get to happier times.
That said, that is not true for everyone. For some they are forced to live their life without having a self of identity. For years Palestinians have lived there lives in exile. It used to exist and was located right next to Israel. The people have been forced out of the only country that they call home. They’re sent to find settlement elsewhere. Their forever refuges in a foreign land. They live in Bedouin tents that are as tall as three year old. That is where they change, feed and nature themselves. For them they do not have place of permanent resident. They don’t get to build up there characteristic of what makes someone the way that they are. They do not get the chance to sit down at their living room, turn the TV on a listen to news about what’s the new trendy thing to do in their country. How could they?
They are treated this way because of who they are. They are Muslims living in the holy land of Jews and Christens. They get judge on what higher belief that they believe in because their belief’s conflict with there, they cannot cohabitate with one another. This has been going on for years now. No one is able to figure out why one hates the other one. For those reasons the new generations of Palestinians will only here the stories of the home land but they will never get to feel like what it meant to be a Palestinian.
Despite living in exile, they are still living. Edward Said wrote this novel to show what it’s like from the Palestinians point of view. Creating new homes and new communities around the world, a future generation of people to pass down the Palestinian ancestry. Even though they do not have an identifiable country to represent themselves, they still are able to spread the Palestinian heritage cross the globe.
To reflect back on her life Mary Karr illustrates her life story though her memoir The Liars Club. She is taking a look back into her life to figure out what had caused the commotions within the family. She takes a look back into all of the misfortunate situations that caused her to grow up a little after than she expected to. The loss of a child’s innocence’s, when a drunken mother rage ripped the family to pieces. When Mary was just a child her mother almost brutally murdered her and her sister. Her mother was not able cope with the life that faith had given her. She was an artist who was trapped in a loveless marriage to a drunken man. Her parents were never at peace with one another, bickering and arguing all the time. How can you expect a child to grow up in a terrible living situation? For these reasons Mary acted out a lot, misbehaving and getting into trouble with the neighbor kids.
For these reasons Karr, decided to look back into her life. She did this in order to find some answers to explain her past. By doing this she was able to over and move on to live a better life. She was able to forgive her past to look to the future and isn’t that what a family does. She made peace in threw her writings. By expressing what she feels out on paper she was able to justify her life. Even though she had a troubled past, she was able to grow up and become a functioning member of society.
Growing up can be hard, if there is no support for you to grow. So having a family love can help you significantly. A family provides a home for you to grow and to spread those colorful peacock wings of ours. My grandparents’ home will always be that little part of me that defines who I am. For their care I was lucky enough to grow up in a nurturing household. Unlike the Palestinians kids who live in refuge because they do not have some to call home. The Palestinians are still out there but they still do not have a country to call home, but they live on as new communities around world. They are spreading there culture and heritage with world to let the world know we are still here. Mary Karr was once faced with one of the most terrific situation that a little kid has to go through. She came out on the other side a stronger person. She was able to take a look back at her past to figure out how to move on. Having home a provides you with the nurture and care you should receive while growing up.