First, yes, I am angry. I’m angry and tired of dealing with ignorant people — particularly about racial justice (which is how this comment thread started), sometimes about sexism. I’m angry and tired of people living within their own bubbles and not being willing to step outside. I’m tired of people living in gleeful ignorance. I fight this both professionally and personally every single day, and it’s goddamn difficult to avoid anger when you are immersed in injustice.*

Frankly, your question seemed/seems genuine, and your ignorance not willful, so my anger wasn’t specifically directed toward you (and it’s the only reason I responded).

So I hope you understand my frustration in general with statements like, “People generally treat women like women and men like men until you change that perception.”

Do you understand the problems inherent in the very idea of society treating “women like women” and “men like men”? Would you tell a Black person, “people generally treat Black people like Black people and white people like white people until you change that perception”?

I should be treated as a human if I’m on the street walking my dog; I should be treated as a lawyer when I introduce myself as one; I should be treated as a teacher when I’m in class. My identity as a woman has no bearing on any of those labels, and neither does my behavior. If I burst out into tears in every single hearing, it’s not because I’m a woman, it’s because I’m an out-of-control attorney. If I skip class to go shoe shopping, it’s not because I’m a woman, it’s because I’m a shitty teacher.

In the end, I hope you understand that in my example above (i.e., “people generally treat black people…..”) it is not up to the Black person to change their behavior and that perception — it’s up to society, and it’s up to YOU to fight against it as the person in the position of power.

*I can only imagine how difficult it is for so many people of color —especially women of color — who not only immerse themselves in fighting injustice, but have to live it as well.