Lauren Modery

Wow. You seem so upset. Why does other people’s happiness upset you?

Okay, to answer your question, yes, our family of five is very happy living in our tiny cottage (252 sq-ft) after nearly a decade. It only cost $7,000 to build. We built it in two months to close in plus some more time to finish off the interior. It was something we could accomplish before winter set in. But then this was back before I had ever heard of “tiny houses” or the “fad”. We did it for practical reasons.

And those reasons still apply today. Our house is super easy to keep clean, to maintain, the taxes are ultra low, the structure is solid (rock) and will last hundreds, maybe thousands, of years. It is self-heating and won’t freeze even in our cold northern central Vermont mountain winters. It’s 100,000 lbs of thermal mass stores the passive solar heat plus the minimal amount of additional heat we get from burning 0.75 cord of wood a year. Since we burn so little wood (our only added heat beyond the sun) it means that putting up wood for the year doesn’t take much time and just comes from our dead wood.

You seem very concerned about sex. Are you getting enough? We are. Don’t worry so much.

You call our property “whimsical”… I’m not sure what you mean by that. We have 1,000 acres of farm and forest. In fact, that’s where we spend most of our daylight hours — we farm when we’re not homeschooling, building something interesting, cooking, gardening, etc. Indoors is for calm time such as evening reading, using a computer, sex. Although, you can do any of those outdoors too if you prefer. So I guess our property is whimsical, if you insist, but we love it too.

But, I think we have determined your problem and the solutions:

  1. Stop cussing. This is going to take some work, obviously, but you can do it. You’ll be better for it. Save that sort of language for things that really matter so it has more impact.
  2. Get some anger management help. You might think it is satire but it comes across as anger.
  3. Build a tiny, or not tiny, house. Use your creativity. Make it be somewhere that you will love to spend the rest of your life.
  4. Have more sex. This can be done alone in a tiny, or big, house but may be more fun with one or more other people…

PS. Our tiny cottage is actually a space ship but don’t tell.

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