THIS IS THE MONTH!

Warda Waseem
Sep 3, 2018 · 3 min read

Just a year back, if I see… my vision seems blur. I am writing this to let you know who I used to be and who I’m now.

A girl lost- Yes! Lately this was the girl full of fears and under the control of this world. Fear of losing the loved ones, fear of losing the dreams, fear of losing necessities.

First Phase-”Reality”

When you are living in a fantasy which you never consider to disappear that’s exactly when life knocks you down to wake you up. And this is what I’ve been through which caused me to suffer.

Second Phase- “Numbness”

Sigh that held,

With-holds the numbness around.

This sounds crazy to live in the sensation when everything around you feels so easy to go with. But here’s this girl who got to face the reality of the world at such tender age that it left me with shivers only. “It hurts for sure”

Third Phase- “They will enter & shall leave”

Yes! That’s true. They shall come to save your soul. They will work to keep you energetic. They will provide the best they can. They will explain how beautiful are you. They will tell how much they love you. But! Eventually they will LEAVE & YOU HAVE NO HOLD TO IT!

Look at this girl... Must be left with loneliness only.

Fourth Phase-”Pity or Acceptance”

They are gone!

Whoever they maybe, be it your loved ones, your family or your friends. They will leave. What’s next now?

Sorrow, depression, anxiety, pain, heart-break, emptiness. Now this was a choice I had been given. Either to cry on whatever has gone or move on.

“You are the Sun”

If they don’t admire your presence,

Surely your absence may not matter!

For them to see you shine,

It’s time to be bright,

Brighter than those heartaches

&

Prettier than those sorrows!

Because this is the life you been blessed,

So,

Accept it- Live it- Love it!

Fifth Phase- “Turning The Tables”

I was told I’m not acceptable because of the way I look and I represent myself. (Time to leave the space which doesn’t allows you to be YOU).

This was the phase where I discovered the real me, my potential and my capabilities. (Thank you for indirectly helping me towards that) It works! *Sigh*

Sixth Phase- “Summing it up”

This is the point where I managed to learn that the mountains which I was trying to carry on my shoulders are those to be climbed. Of course, it took me ruthless nights, hopeless days & pathetic months. But I summed up to be “ME”.

Eternal truth- “You are not here to please them, you just have to be YOU”

A Note to “ME”

It is tough, I admit!

It is painful, I accept!

It is heart-wrenching, I agree!

But-

It is fragile, I say!

It is pleasant, I represent!

It is heart-warming, I promulgate!

Seventh Phase- “Subtle yet defined”

Inside Only: Today I choose to be me because you can’t keep me.

I was broken just because you selected that for me. But today, I pray for you to heal. I am not tired of not being okay but I sincerely thank you for all that you did to me. This gives me power- The better the believer.

Here is how we are

subtle yet defined,

Scrap isn’t shown

steadily but grown,

Unapologetically;

To whomever reading it, Look at this girl…

The day you left

I started moving to myself,

Empowered to feel the pain

& cleanse the soul.

This is the real me,

Undefined, yet the purer the prettier.

A promise kept:

I’m here to welcome you with all your pains because I believe,

THIS TOO SHALL PASS!

Proud Pakistani.

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