Safety Pins and Solidarity

A lot of people have started using a safety pin to indicate that they are a “safe person.” That they are an “ally.” That they will act as an advocate for the marginalized in the world, that they will sit next to them on the train, and otherwise be safe.

There are a few problems with that, but one of the biggest is simply that the marginalized have a long, long history of so-called “allies” not living up to the title. A lot of self-proclaimed allies… aren’t and even those who are tend not to be intersectional. It can even be incredibly difficult in some cases to be a safe person to multiple groups at the same time—or to be competent in multiple areas of intersecting disadvantage.

You don’t get to call yourself an ally. Ally is a verb. Not an identity.

You don’t get to declare yourself safe. #NotAllMen is in part a manifestation of men going around and saying “but you should trust me!”

A lot of people are going to wear them and act in ways that are not exactly becoming of allies. In part because it is pretty much impossible to be a perfect ally all of the time to everyone. In part because people get really defensive about their ally identity.

Another major problem is that a safety pin is a dirt common object that anyone can wear. So if you are encouraging people to look for safety pins, they might very well run into someone who isn’t actually an ally while looking for help.

They might help in that regard, they seem unlikely to hurt, but it’s a bit of a big ask to reach out and say to people “you should trust me because I own a piece of metal wire.” As my partner wrote about the topic:

The safety pin is a great symbol. But it’s meaningless without action and follow-through. The people who are at risk get to decide if you are actually safe. And if they’re wary or uncertain? Don’t you DARE get upset about it. They have a right to be.

On the other hand there is also an element of solidarity in using a shared symbol (e.g., look at Pepe). In the online world I am seeing safety pins for avatars—even among Congressional representatives—and even the ACLU and the SPLC have gotten in on using it in their twitter profiles.

The SPLC says of the change: “Small gesture but we’ve changed our profile pic. We stand everyday against bigotry and hatred.”

This is a different meaning behind a safety pin than “I am a safe person.” It is saying instead:

I stand in solidarity with the marginalized. I stand against bigotry and hatred.

Symbols of solidarity are a different matter:

This is also one of the major reported meanings for using a safety pin. It isn’t “I am a safe person and you can approach me,” it is instead “we stand together.” But when we advertise “I am virtuous” versus “you are not alone” we are in dangerous territory:

It’s entirely too easy to don a symbol and go “I am teh awesome! I deserve cookies now!” Especially when you don’t have to live with the societal oppression every day.

I might wish for a different symbol, something to differentiate that is brighter and more visible, that can be recognized even at a distance, or even something without so much history… but a safety pin is what we got and given how widespread it has become I am more interested in shaping what it means than trying to reject it outright. Because the SLPC and ACLU and even Sir Patrick Stewart have started using it in a way of standing together, it’s the symbol we have right now and it seems to be taking over.

Rather than fight that I would advocate—speaking as a queer neurodivergent person—let’s use it. At least until something else comes along (maybe a ribbon or an armband that we can fasten with a safety pin?) Let’s use it to mean “we stand together.” Let’s use it to mean, in the words of ¡TchKung!:

Stand together, answer the call \ What we need is solidarity \ Injury to one is an injury to all

Some people have suggested supporting #BlackLivesMatter and wearing a pin for them instead, but as a white person I am very very hesitant to start using #BlackLivesMatter to represent, for example, solidarity with white queers. Support #BlackLivesMatter, donate and wear supportive gear by all means (it is part of good allyship, after all), but let’s not erase or downplay their central message and co-opt their symbols while trying to build solidarity across the spectrum.

That said, if you are going to wear a safety pin…

• Read So You Want to Wear a Safety Pin. Understand what it means to be an “ally” in this and be ready to perform as such. Even if we largely use it to mean “in solidarity” we need to be prepared to follow that token symbol with action.
• Read “Ally” is a verb not a noun. This particular guide is specific to LGBTQ+, but the general advice applies much more broadly.
• Don’t get defensive. Especially about various symbols of solidarity or if someone doesn’t automagically trust you (doing either is “missing the point.”)
• Support other causes, such as #BlackLivesMatter and people/groups who are speaking out and making a difference, such as Black Girl Dangerous. This can be with money, this can be with time, this can be with convincing your relatives… whatever it is that you can do, but do it.
• Make sure you educate yourself across multiple intersectional axes. Talk to people across the spectrum of the marginalized who have a diverse set of lived experiences.
• Read How to Tell the Difference Between Real Solidarity and ‘Ally Theater’
• Expand your following list, follow and listen to people who are not like you.
• Don’t turn away. Don’t let the normalization happen. See what is happening in the world and speak out. Make sure you see it for what it is.
• Do engage in Bystander Intervention.
• Reflect on yourself. Improve yourself. Make yourself a better person and a better ally each day. Don’t worry as much about being perfect as constantly improving.
• Many of us have areas of intersection where we are marginalized in some ways and oppressors in others. Make sure you understand both.
• Take care of yourself. You are a more effective ally if you are taking care of yourself.

Remember that showing solidarity is not enough by itself—especially if your actions contradict the symbol—but it isn’t a bad thing either. A show of solidarity can remind others that they are not alone.

Further Reading/Watching

This is going to be long and is barely going to scratch the surface, because there’s just so much, but don’t become overwhelmed. This is a process, not a product.

• feminism is for everybody, by bell hooks
• Letter from a Birmingham Jail, by Martin Luther King, Jr.
• Brené Brown on Empathy, by Brené Brown
• Managing Privilege and Harassment, by Robot Hugs
• An A-Z Guide for Being a Good Muslim Ally, by Zoha Qamar
• What to do if you are witnessing Islamaphobic Harassment, by Maeril
• A Burst of Light, by Audre Lorde
• A Different Mirror: A History of Multicultural America, by Ronald Takaki
• Privilege, Power, and Difference, by Allan G. Johnson
• Building a Movement to End the New Jim Crow: an organizing guide, by Daniel Hunter
• I’m not down with the safety pin backlash