The mood swings of wedding planning
It’s been a little over 90 days since I’ve been engaged, and I’m not sure that anyone could’ve prepared me for what I’ve experienced in such a short amount of time.
After my then boyfriend popped the question, I was ready.
Ready to start saving money. Ready to comb through Pinterest. And even ready to deal with people who were already asking about the projected birth date of our first child.
What I wasn’t ready for were the mood swings … and I’m not talking about me. I can proudly say that I am not a bridezilla (well, at least not yet).
I’m talking about the shift in attitudes of my family and friends and how they’ve seemed to progress through different stages of feelings as I progress through my wedding planning. It’s still pretty early, but here’s what I’ve seen thus far.
Congratulatory
This stage is hands down the most fun. At this point, people are genuinely excited and can’t wait to celebrate the wedding. Early gifts, words of wisdom and parties/happy hour outings are rampant during this time. The best thing I can compare it to is how the holiday season makes everyone jolly and full of cheer.
“I’m so happy for you guys!” … “I love, love!” … “If you need anything, just let me know.”
Oh, it was such a delightful period of my life. But you know what they say, every honeymoon has its ending.
Pushy
Once the pleasantries are over, another face rears its ugly head. I like to call it the “I-know-this-isn’t-my-wedding-but-I-think-you-should-do-this” stage… or pushy, for short.
What’s funny about this stage is that nearly all topics seem to be open for discussion. And let me be clear, a suggestion is one thing ... but when words like “should” or “need to” are included in your sentence, forgive me if I tune out.
- You should wear your hair straight.
- You should have your cousin as a bridesmaid.
- You need to have a photo booth.
- You need to allow children at the ceremony.
What I should do … and what I need to do … is consult with my future husband about what we want to do for our wedding ceremony. We’re open to feedback, but we don’t have time for the Cookie Lyons of our circle.
Angry
At this point, the pushy folks will either retreat back to the congratulatory stage, or venture into the angry stage. Sigh …
If you’ve been a bride, you know this stage.
The threats of not coming to the wedding start … the indifferent, fine you do what you want, attitudes … everything just hits the fan.
But you know what, I won’t spend too much time on this stage because it really isn’t that deep. My fiance and I are more focused on planning our marriage than the wedding, because at the end of the day, that’s what’s most important.
And while logically that sounds right, I understand emotions can get the best of people. So while I continue my planning, I’m eager to see the next round of emotions.
Are you married or a bride-to-be? What other stages of emotions have you experienced? Help me prepare!
