The Kontrast | Chapter 6

It was the walk to Bois de Boulogne that ruined Andreas. Part 2.

The rhythm stopped. The rain stopped. It was quiet now.

The warm melody of childhood left him, and in its place was a blue and violet hooker in a crunchy rain jacket. She stood with a skinny, energetic man that moved like a strobe light in front of her.

What Andreas, nor James or Sebastian knew, was among the gently curving roads that carried travelers through the forest of Bois de Boulogne, were droves of hookers diligently working the night shift. It was the hidden Moulin Rouge of Paris, politely tucked away in the outskirts of the city.

And Andreas had unknowingly crept through the woods and joined a young couple who were enjoying an hour of the evening together.

He stood there, staring at the them, transfixed. His eyes were open but he couldn’t interpret where he was or what was happening. He nervously scanned left and right, sending little bursts of sensation to his brain. It was the moment when a child opens her eyes for the first time. This was his new world.

Of course, he had considered paying for sex before, but it had never been so tangible. It had always seemed like something that wasn’t real. He knew that this person was a means to getting what he wanted, without the cost of earning it. He thought this might be the same feeling drugs give people, as alcohol allowed him to speak freely and many people said they were similar in some ways.

He stood just a few steps from them, staring at her as she slowly moved. She was the rhythm he’d heard. Her sounds, her motion. With the rain and breeze that moved the leaves around him. This was the rhythm that he’d been lost in. Nature.

Her eyes slowly opened and gazed lazily at Andreas. A sultry smile crept across her face and Andreas could feel his eyes squinting with curiosity and his brow wrinkling as he tried to understand. She was beautiful. Her hair bounced up and down and she smiled and giggled, never breaking eye contact with him. He envied her.

He knew she had seen the ugliness of life, and chose acceptance over despair. She knew a freedom that was not understood by those who were protected from suffering. It was deep and genuine. Andreas felt embarrassed. He lived in fear of what was beyond the comfort of his life. He didn’t know true unfairness. He didn’t know what it was like to be mistreated. Life had been good to him in many ways, for which he was grateful, but he was seeing how living a comfortable life was also living a prison of his own fear.

In fact, this was one of the reasons he had chosen to walk the Camino de Santiago. To suffer every day for a long time, perhaps to make up for a lifetime of comfort.

He backed up slowly, still facing them, until he couldn’t see her eyes anymore.

Sebastian and James were still fooling around right where Andreas left them. He could see them in the distance, chugging through a case of beer, laughing and screwing around. He wondered if they would notice how long he was gone.

He slowly returned to them, walking with his hands in his pockets. They offered him a beer. He didn’t want any more beer. He was sobered by the reality he’d faced. He wanted to sleep and start a new day. They continued walking to the campsite, but this time along a river that joined the west side of the campground.

As they walked along the river, they heard people talking in the distance on the same trail behind them. They slowed their pace so the group could catch up.

A girl who was walking far ahead of the group on her own approached Andreas. She spoke English and then German as she realized he was Swiss.

“Wohin gehst du?” Where are you going?, she asked.

“We’re trying to make it to this campsite in the park. We are just visitors to Paris.”

“We too.”

The company of a woman soothed him. The familiar language brought him home. He was terrified and had much to think about, but in this moment he felt exposed and was comforted by the safety of familiarity.

Sebastian and James joked loudly with the group while Andreas and the girl led the way. She wasn’t like the prostitute in the woods, and she wouldn’t understand if he tried to explain what he had seen. Besides, it was too soon to speak openly of abstract things as they had only just met and it would break the comfort he was enjoying in that moment. So they talked about what they planned on doing in Paris, where they were from, and what they were going to do next on the trip.

Andreas was mostly quiet at the campground that night. He hung his wet clothes on a rope he tied between two small trees that leaned with the weight of the clothes. He said goodnight to Sebastian and James, and slid into his sleeping bag to rest.