On jealousy
Oli Treadwell
41

life is a bitch sometimes, ya?

On jealously being jealous.

Oli, you aren’t alone here.

We all feel self-doubt and fear about our own success and futures. It is the nature of our age group. There is an almost +- 10 year period as each of us puts the pieces of our life together. We graduate from schools and the paths we have set ourselves on begin to unfold.

For some, it is a straight and narrow path of continued education with the outcome being a secure job in an established sector(think doctor, lawyer, investment banker, etc.). Their +- 10 year period of “getting there” is set on a timeline that they can rely on.

For others, like us(I only draw this comparison because I know you, and I know what you’ve been up to), the journey is a bit more of a winding path. We are in the thick of creating what our future will look like. Do not back away from this opportunity to do exactly what you love, right now. Our +- 10 year period is on a sliding timeline. Don’t let it freak you out.

We all have those friends.

They are the ones who are making a killing working at those jobs that we can’t imagine how they got there. Their life seems so much more simple, they have “made it.” Jealous is a fickle bitch sometimes. I can’t help but compare myself to certain friends. Are they smarter? More skilled? More hardworking? More charming? More connected? Better educated? Truth is, the people I am most jealous of are almost always more skilled than I am in a specific area of expertise. They are a brilliant coder or a brilliant designer. They honed their practical skills far before I did, and are now in the a place to prosper.

Getting jealous of someone else for being more skilled in a certain area is crazy. I try not to dwell on it. There will always be people more skilled than me at MOST things in this life. I just try to remind myself that I have valuable skills of my own. I am also realistic about my practical skills. If something will take me months to figure out how to do, but will take someone else a week, I will look for help. We all have something to bring to the table.

Other friends whom I feel jealousy toward are those who truly know what they are passionate about, and attack their passions with gusto. Maybe they love fashion and don’t just dream about being a designer, they are out there making, selling, and marketing clothes. Maybe they love photography, and they are traveling the world just taking pictures.

Those are the two types of people I am jealous of, those who are more skilled than me and those who are more passionate.

So that is what I try to do: find work that I am passionate about, and try to hone my practical skills as much as possible.

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