MAKING SURE SHE ACTUALLY GETS WHAT SHE WANTS.

I’m a Black man with my Black fiance and this is another post about the healing process as part of our companionship.

It’s Saturday morning.

I do not ask her if she wants to do x,y, or z today.

I ask her if she saw any interesting advertisements. 
I ask her if she clipped any coupons for anything. 
I ask her if there is a place she hasn’t been in a while and wants to go back.

Specifics need to be left out because she might register that as a suggestion or something that I’ll want to do and she’ll agree to that as opposed to even suggesting that she might have an activity she’d prefer at all.

This is because she grew up in and lives in a world where her ideas are mocked.

Her wants are discarded.

And her consent…. is up for negotiation…. with terrorists

A Black woman should not be with a Black man that does not prioritize her wants as well as her needs.

Make sure that she has great memories and explores, experiences as much she likes should be a chief concern for a Black man with a Black woman.

If not. 
That Black man is unfit and should be avoided. 
If a Black woman can safely leave an unfit Black man, I suggest doing so immediately and continuing the rest of the only life she is going live making sure her wants are met just as well as her needs.

Time can not be replaced.

Black women already have ridiculous amounts of time stolen from them through all the systems under White Supremacy.

If a Black man isn’t there to help her make the best of the little bit of time these oppressive systems allow her to enjoy then…

…If I may dip back into the 90’s for a moment.

He can “Get To Steppin’”