The rigid seeking of #validation #happiness #satisfaction

What is the one thing you can do today that can bring me closer to your goals?

Mary sent me two great chapters for the novel we’re working on, I have to add two of my won. Yesterday I noticed I can get a lot more writing done if I push myself. I’ve also noticed that by pushing Mary to write, I have the reflex to set the right example and I push myself to write more.

Other things you absolutely want to focus on today:

Yesterday I finally managed to eat less than I usually do, I want to build a streak and eat less today as well.

How can you create more value today than you did yesterday?

Write 20 percent more than I wrote yesterday.

What made you feel happy, in flow, recently?

Waking up at 6 am and reading the chapters Mary sent me last night. Sleeping with the windows open, the air in Slovakia smells so much better than the air in Belgium…

I am grateful for:

Our appartment gives us a sense of opportunity, in part because of the view we have from the balconies.

I’m really excited about:

Finding more tricks to do more each day.

These are the most important habits I’m building:

Have the reflex to write, instead of wasting time on YouTube.

Stuff I did right:

Pushing myself to work more.

Systematically following and gathering Neo-Confederates and blogging about it here.

Things I’ve learned:

Gretchen Rubin is unknowingly stumbling on the six human needs in her book ‘the happiness projects’ (see picture above). Her writing is fine, but I have the feeling she’s been so succesful because she has a strong network… Are we all only as strong as our network?

Also: For the last ten years or so I’m constantly, meaning literally non-stop, plague by the feeling that if I don’t have readers I do not exist. This feeling gives me constant cramps in my core, I mean, I feel a very clear physical strain on my body, because I’m almost fanatically seeking validation through writing, as if I do not matter at all unless somebody reads what I write. I know this is not healthy, and it’s a major source of unhappiness, but I’ve never figured out what to do about it. So far what makes this feeling the least bad, is to write a lot, but writing doesn’t make it go away. If I don’t write I fall into a state of gloom and despair. I know where this comes from, but knowing where the roots of this are, doesn’t heal it.

So what should I do? Simply write more? What would I tell myself if I were my own therapist? Honestly, I have no idea.

Openly communicating about this issue has made me feel slightly better.

What would you do today if you weren’t afraid?

Finish a Civil War article and send it to a newspaper…. Plus all the stuff I’ve mentioned in earlier posts… I HATE HOW FEAR IS HOLDING US BACK.

Live an authentic day!