District of Columbia Will Not Attend Trump’s Inauguration
Breaking with a 200-year-old tradition, the geographic area known as the District of Columbia announced that it will not attend President-Elect Donald Trump’s inauguration.
The District indicated it would instead “crawl back into the Maryland mud” from which it was carved.
Unlike the metaphorical hole created by others who will not be in attendance, the absence of the 69-square-mile area will leave an actual hole.
Dismissing safety concerns, the District said its actions would help Trump and his supporters. “This will bring them one step closer to the place they’ll ultimately reside.”
Alabama has been asked to fill in for the absent land mass according to an anonymous Trump transition team insider. The southern state could not be reached for comment.
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