L,

I don’t hate you, I’m actually deeply in love with you.

You’re hurt, I didn’t do my best in trying to comfort you.

Truth is, I’m alone.

I’m lonely. I’m scared.

The world is spinning so quickly and I’m falling behind and it seems like I’ve been loosing my footing just a bit these days.

I can’t tell you this because I’m a coward. I’m supposed to be the shoulder you can cry on, the hand you can hold on to pick you up when you’re down but lately I feel like I’m fading away. I’m there, I’m not invisible but I’m turning grey- like when Fat Albert and his friends spent too much time in the real world? Exactly like that!

I think I’ve spent too much time spinning in one spot in all my wonderful thoughts about life… and death — why the advice you’ve been getting from me seems like the same thing over and over and over and over again.

You talk about being in love with this person you know and how you can’t get over them. I want you to be happy but I want you to know I love you a lot. I used to say I love you and I wasn’t afraid of it. Now I can’t even find a single word to express how amazing you are, I’m too afraid that I’ll become too passionate about it or come off as a weirdo.
 I love you a lot and I care for you with all my heart. I think about you everyday but you think about someone else the same way and who would I be able to tell if everyone I know disapproves of these kinds of relationships? 
Who do I run to?

I wish I could lay my head on your chest, just to listen to your heartbeat.