Proverbs of Burning Man
Even after watching countless hours of YouTube videos about the Burn, reading every post on ePlaya, and talking to those who have been there before, there is still no escaping the fact that some truths of Burning Man can only be learned through experience….
Mutant Vehicles
Mutant vehicles are the life blood of the Playa. Without them, the whole event would be nothing but a long dusty bike ride on an arid dry lake bed. But once you add in the MVs, you’ve entered a fantastical world of moving art.
Of course, that does raise the question as to whether or not these mobile pieces of artistic expression are actually safe to ride on. But leave that concern for others. You’re already naked and on the way to the next pub, you dusty burner you.
Dancing On Coals
Yeah, it might sound like a great idea before you get on the Playa, but once you get near the still burning timbers and hot embers of the collapsed man, you’ll remember that hot coals are things best for cooking on and not dancing on.
So save your dancing for somewhere else, far from the fire and in a place that won’t melt the soles of your boots nor singe your short hairs.
Fuck Your Burn
Everyone wants to have a great Burn. But what you want and what you get are often two different things. Sometimes the Burns that are a lot of fun, have great weather, and little dust, are nothing more than a good camping trip. It’s usually the hard ones that turn out to be the “best” Burns. The ones where you fought against the elements, had disagreements, problems, and personal struggles, It’s those Burns that you look back on, and realize how much it made you who you are today.
Burner Lingo
Like any subculture, Burning Man is full of inside jokes, expressions, and specialty vocabulary. From Safety Third to Sparkle Ponies; This One Time At Burning Man to The Playa Provides. Half of the fun of Burning Man is figuring out what your fellow burners are talking about. The other half of the fun of Burning Man doing the obligatory things which every virgin Burner must do if they want to be considered a real burner.
Clean-Up
Experienced burners know that unfortunately the charity, kindness, and communal spirit of most burners disappears in the smoke of the burning Temple. Unlike the comradeship present at the start of the Burn during set up, the end can often be a lonely, frustrating time as fellow burners flee for the Gate Road, leaving tear down (as well as their bikes and gray water) for those left behind to deal with.
The Burner Motto
Ask any burner how their burn went and they’ll undoubtedly tell you that next year’s was better. That’s because it was. It’s also a reminder that no matter how much things sucked, how hot it was or how many whiteouts that you experienced, it was worth every moment and you’ll be coming back next year. Because it was, you know, better…
