“ ‘Scuse me… miss… would you mind if we used the other side of yer picnic table?”
Said the attractive gentleman in the tattered clothes, and long, jet black hair: shirt unbutton to show 78% of his torso…
No I’m not writing a romance novel. I’m writing about my time in Como, MO. Aka, Colombia, MO aka coolest place around aka y’all should never visit. So says the man who owns the pig and wearing suspenders…
Back home, I’d never allow 3 strange men to come sit at a picnic table with me and a friend, in a town I’ve never been in. But, we’re down South. Southern men, wouldn’t DARE treat a women wrong. (Not that there aren’t some who do, but chances are, they’re either creeps, or not actually FROM the South.)
But, here we are. At a thing called “Yappie Hour” at the Rose Music Hall. Listening to banjos softly play in the background. Letting her shiba run amuck. When I say amuck, I mean he was greeting EVERY single person. He’s so friendly. So we keep an eye on him and start making friendly with the locals. My friend lives here, I’m just visiting.
My friend goes to get tacos, I’m watching the dog. And tattered shirt, bare chest dude walks up and says, in a beautiful, mild mind you, southern drawl, “ ‘scuse me… miss… would y’all mind if we sat here on the other side of yer picnic table…” I’m like no, come on, take a seat!
(You address me as miss, or ma’am, you can pretty much get me to agree to anything. HAHA)
So bare chest and his friend sit down. MY friend comes back and is like what the crap? Then suspender/pig guy shows up and sits down! Things just got weird and wonderful after that.
Bare chest guys friend, just moved into a new house, after a “rough year”… we did not bother to ask. Haha
Bare chest was rolling his own joint and asking pig man if he wanted one.
And pig man. Pig man has a pig. Pig man wanted to know if he could have brought his pig to the Yappie Hour (it’s free music + dogs) and he doesn’t see why not. The pig, as pig man described him, was grey and $25 dollars. What does it look like?
“…A pig, a grey pig…”
Didn’t have the heart to tell him, that his tiny ham hock won’t be tiny for long.
Much more happened. But it’s a lot to type out. Suffice it to say, if I were a younger me… I’d of left my friend, and smoked weed, and slept with bare chest…
I think his name was Travis…?