IF I HAD THE MONEY

I would eat 49 pears a month (if I could afford it).

I would drink 24 beers a week (if the money was there).

I would donate 20% of my monthly income to charity (if I could only pick one I feel good about/afford a new car battery).

I would eat out 8 times a week (if I didn’t think it was bad for my health (catastrophic-only).

I would buy my friends books they’d never read (My tastes are not theirs, but you should really look into the Moomin series, by Tove Jansson); a book a week for all my friends!

I would volunteer at a place once a week; a sad place, a happy place, a place where help is found; where one comes when one is worried and needs support; some place.

If I had the money, I would give it all away (I don’t like change).