Short Story (Part 3)

Please find other parts of the story here :
Part 1
Part 2

“So, what is your story?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, you are clearly fucked mentally, emotionally. What do you, blame your shit on?”, I asked
He took a long time to answer, as if going through a flashback and deciding whether to scratch an old wound. With a big breath and an even bigger draw of the cigarette, he said,
“Same old story, love, heartbreak, the impending realization of how crazy and madly in love you are, or at least with the idea of love. Although, she was something else, beautiful, intense and she had the confidence of a rock star, for me she was no less than a supermodel, a goddess. I didn’t know what it was back then, I just wanted her, something primal in me arose and I just wanted to be the guy who kisses her, who goes up to her in front of the entire world, in the public, grabs her waist, pulls her to his face and just kisses her, shouting to everyone out there that she was his, as he was hers. Like two souls had finally connected, and were going to be entangled, forever and more.”

“And then?”

He looked at me and then his hand, he threw away the cigarette butt, its life was already over, with the fire having consumed it. I think he used to smoke because he could see it getting consumed, burning out. Maybe it felt like he had a front-line view to the minute by minute end of his life. People can be weird that way, coping differently.

“And then we were not. Entangled. Together. I was young, dumb and had no patience. She was broken, with too much baggage. Her life had always been a shit-fest, and she had forgotten what normal meant. She was dead inside and I was famously and fabulously in love. For me, it was like finding the sweet nectar of god, the fountain of youth. I believed I had made it, I had won. Found the love of my life. But…”, he said, his voice cracking.

He sighed something heavy, stood up and went to the record player. He put in a new record and there I was sitting, listening to the crux of a guy, having met him barely 2 times. It made me think, of all the people that I had passed by, all the lives I saw from the surface but never touched.

And out came the tunes of George Michael, lost was his love, just like him,

♪ So, I am never gonna dance again,
The way I danced with you… ♪

George was singing his heart out, having missed out on probably the love of his life.

He was walking towards me and lend his hand forward, asking for that dance. I was on my feet, holding his hand, another palm on his shoulder as his hand touched my waist. I could swear I felt a current run through me. We moved gently, we swayed and he looked into my eyes.

“I cheated on her. I broke that poor girl, in the worst way possible. I thought with my dick and fucked multiple women. I justified my shitty behavior telling myself it was just sex. That girl waiting for me, is the love of my life and we are gonna have the happy ending. So what if I stick my dick in some strange women, sow my wild oats. I will never get this chance again and then she rightfully left me, I think what hurt the most was, she didn’t say a word as she left me. I never got over her. I never found what she felt, how disappointed she was in me. To this day, I don’t know what and how she felt.”

“You are an asshole.”, it was all I could muster. I was still processing what he just said. I pulled myself away from him and sat back on the bed. My mind still surprised. I felt stupid for all that I assumed about this supposedly sweet, kind guy.

“I have been calling myself that every day since, plus some other choice words that any sailor would appreciate. Biggest mistake of my life and what’s worse is, I never did anything to rectify it, just wallowed like a little bitch.”, he came and sat down.

“Why would you tell me all that? We barely know each other.”
“Why would I hide it? Hiding or lying about that won’t change the facts, or what I did. It would be just running away. I am fucked up, but I am not delusional. Real life doesn’t let you get away.”, he said, genuinely surprised at my question.

An eternity passed, the silence remained unbroken, the tiny yellow light kept bright with the occasional flickers, inching closer to its own end. The night breeze was sweet but a bit warm, making the room quite comfortable and cozy. But more than the breeze I felt his hand on mine.

“I am stoned out of my mind, not to forget drunk.”, he said with his eyes wide and a hint of smiling anxiousness on his face.
Whatever was on my mind took a back seat and it did get a chuckle out of me.

“You know, I am sorry I laid that out on you. You probably weren’t expecting that. Maybe expected me to just get you back in my room, set some music and make out. Sorry to disappoint.”, he said almost teasingly.

“Mmhmm, the thought did cross my mind but then you started speaking and I couldn’t think. I was just lost in your words, worlds and emotions.”, I said.

We were kissing. By the time I realized anything we were already kissing and I was kissing back. Without any hesitation or regret, I wasn’t even thinking who I was kissing. Me, my body, my heart we were all in it together. We all wanted it. It was a good kiss, a passionate kiss but what felt wonderfully weird was how it escalated, every second that I kissed him my desires and the fire within me heightened. I wanted more, it was the forbidden fruit.

I was sitting on his lap facing him and too involved in this, my body couldn’t wait any more, could not resist. We were frantically unbuttoning our clothes, in a hurry, as if waiting for few seconds would make a difference but that’s the thing about wanting something real bad, you want it now, at that moment. That is the power of the flesh, and the weakness of us, poor beings.

He, on the other hand was too calm for this, passionate but calm, he just looked into my eyes, saw my body and took it in. Looking and seeing something more than what the world saw. He was looking for the soul, the person beneath the skin.

It was a moment of wild lust with affection as its creator, it’s the best kind. In the moment, having let your inner ones take over you, take the wheel. We kissed, we touched, we felt each others bodies. It was the difference between sex and “making love”.

We fucked something good, the thrusts were deep and passionate, the kisses were long and hard and the bodies never left each other’s embrace. It was the need and want to be one, to be searching the missing part in your life, fill the void and lie in happiness and peace as the clock ticked, the seconds moved and we breathed. There was no need for the words, it was that elusive and much sought comfortable silence while our loins burnt and the desire of flesh was satiated.

“I feel something rare, but I also feel something sad.”, his words were surprising.
“What do you mean?”, surprised me asked.

“I feel incredibly happy and loved and it feels like this was missing in my life, as if the world and fate decided today was going to be my lucky day and sent you to me, what we had back there was nothing short of magic dust and unique and I don’t know about you but it doesn’t happen to me all that often. It’s rare, and I don’t know what the end of this night holds for us. I don’t know what the both of us are looking for, wanting, and would desire tomorrow when the hangover is gone and maybe the more sensible emotions take over. I feel like I understand the allure of the nights and why the writers and poets don’t want the nights getting over.”, it was beautiful as much as raw it was, his thoughts and I was jealous of him the way he was able to pour it out, say his heart, be that expressive and use the words to his advantage.

“To be honest, I don’t know. I don’t know who we are going to be tomorrow when we wake up, but I like us tonight, I like who we are right now. I like how my skin feels on you and I love every drop of sweat between us. It feels personal and right. I am enjoying this too much and right now, all I want to think about is, this moment and you and us.”, was all I could muster to soothe his mind, to give him something to cling on to as I myself figured what I felt and wanted.

“Tomorrow, we will figure it out tomorrow. Right now all I want to do is cuddle up in your warm embrace and look out at the moon from the window. It’s pretty and the night time silence makes me feel, right in the moment, for once I am not thinking of the past and the future.”, I partially lied and partially tried to enjoy the moment.