This is my brain without a SNRI
I took my last tiny dose of venlafaxine on Thursday 2 November.
I finally got down to such a small dose — just 4mg — it seemed a bit pointless to continue taking it considering how much of a hassle it was.
Sure, I’m having my usual side effect of dizziness but it’s at point where I think it’s possible to tough it out. This afternoon hasn’t been a lot of fun but we’ll see how I am tomorrow.
I’m aware I’ve weened myself off the venlafaxine incredibly quickly. I started this process in the middle of July so it’s only been about four and a half months.
Perhaps it’s because I’m simply too stubborn and bloody-minded for my own good.
Still, even this feels like it’s taken too long but for so many people this process takes months, if not years.
I got asked why I decided to ween myself off the venlafaxine when I was getting the extremely beneficial side effect of sciatica pain management (managed to the point where it has essentially stopped).
I’m aware that’s a pretty big benefit and it’s one that has improved my life considerably.
But…
I’m at a stage where I don’t believe I need the medication for the reasons it was prescribed. It’s done the job it was meant to and I’m in a much better place than where I was when I started taking it.
I don’t believe the pain management benefit is enough to warrant staying on it. After all, I know I can work on my sciatica without medication as I’ve done it before.
The whole having to schedule my life around medication has become more and more frustrating and annoying for me.
I decided to take it at dinner time so if I went out I had to make sure I had it with me. If I forgot it or dinner out was a spontaneous decision, I had to make sure I took it as soon as I got home.
But when I did take it while out, I felt like people were watching me take it and judging me. (I’m more than aware this isn’t true and the majority wouldn’t have cared what I was doing.)
I gave up alcohol because you’re advised to not drink and I could never predict how a glass of wine with dinner was going to affect me.
For some reason, this in particular really bothered me — which is odd because I’m not a huge drinker. But having the choice completely taken away from me really rankled.
I think it’s because, to a degree, being on venlafaxine these days makes me feel like I’m either not capable of or shouldn’t be trusted to make my own decisions.
I guess that’s what it really boils down to in the end is that I don’t believe I need it any more. I feel like I’m in a place where I can make good choices and sensible decisions.
Getting to this point hasn’t been much fun.
It’s not the fault of my GP that I thought this would be easy. She only has on the information and guidelines she’s been given by the health department and pharmaceutical companies.
The problem is the “accepted” timeline for weening off these drugs is completely at odds with the reality.
It’s not possible to stop taking this medication in a few weeks which is the advice given to GPs. (Well, you can if you want to experience some of the worst weeks of your life.)
This has to change.
There needs to be research done into weening off anti-depressants. There needs to be so much more work done on the potential side effects of these drugs, both while you’re on them and when coming off.
The current timeline of a few weeks is utter bullshit. There also needs to be so much more information available about what’s going to happen to you when you do decide to stop taking the medication.
Like I said, I don’t blame my GP but I can’t help but feel more than a little let down.
Read my other article about my experience on venlafaxine.
I’m taking part in a charity cycling event in February 2024. Be awesome if you could throw a few bucks my ways: Lauren in Ride for Relief 2024. 🚴🏼♀️
If you can, watch The Antidepressant Story, made by the BBC’s Panorama program. In Australia, where I am, it’s still on ABC iView: Four Corners.
