Welcome to Trendsylvania, the most dopeliest new content aggregator on the Web.
Get stuffed, Now This. We’re Trendsylvania — the bad boys of content.
I’m only gonna type this once, but I’ll do it mostly with caps, asterisks, and no punctuation so you know that I’m either edgy, ironic, post-woke, or hilarious:
TRENDSYLVANIA IS THE BEST NEWEST ***BUTTDUMP*** OF GIF MEMES AND SCREENCAPS OF MOMS ON FACEBOOK THAT YOU ARE GOING TO FIND ONLINE AS LONG AS YOU PAUSE YOUR ADBLOCK
My name is Gambit and I am the Editor-in-Chief of Trendsylvania, a website whose name is the intersection of three concepts: the measure of a content’s memeliness, vampire stuff, and coal country. If I even have to explain to you the cultural significance of this name within our current sociopolitical context and from a historiographical perspective, YOU CAN BEND YOURSELF!!!!
Reblog that, sharehounds.
Me and my non-binary allies Crystalpher, Quiz, and Sam were fed up with the biased and out-of-touch content littering our feeds, so we decided to take matters into our own hands and launch Trendsylvania, where we promise we will only post material that fits under the following tags: rawdog, sex-positive, 2017 Y’ALL, catface, indigenous, Vans, Khaleesi, body art.
When we officially launch tonight at midnight, I personally guarantee that within the first 20 minutes of live scrolling, you will consume the following premium contents:
- a middle school yearbook photo of Chris Pine
- daddy-daughter yoga
- an infographic studying the relationship between newspaper subcribership and violent crime in urban environs
- multi-faith worship services in Syria
- A goat in a diaper
- Goofy obituaries
- Sasha Obama’s science fair project
- The cast of Becker twenty years later
- Justin Trudeau’s workout
- Living zero-waste in a DIY-converted camper van off-grid
This and much more. Trendsylvania. Breathe bigger.