How I Curated A Book List About Race in the Time of Corona and the Black Lives Matter Movement
Since January 2020, every muscle in my brain has been in touch with every muscle in my body. I have felt different emotions on a daily basis, and taking avocado-oil baths have helped out in a major way with stress and anxiety. Everyday as a librarian & archivist, I represent an African American Community Archives Program in Austin, Texas. It has been a pleasure and honor to represent Black folk in the state that I was born and raised. My role in the community affords me the opportunity to speak for and about Black people in varied forms. Know that I represent a state capitol where African American people have been played since their arrival in the early 1800s as slaves. This is their land — it was not made for you and me.
I have been interviewed by radio stations, TV reporters, and online media platforms to speak to this fact (about the land), because we all know what happened to that 40 acres and a mule idea. As of late, I haven’t felt to compelled about saying anything about Black people, because often I believe that a lot of folk forget that I am African American in the workplace and in the community. It’s like, I am the expert about history, but let us not forget…I am also an expert that has been the recipient of the same travesties that my brothers and sisters experience on a daily basis. Fannie Lou Hammer has been on mind these days and I imagine her telling me, “Sometimes it seem like to tell the truth today is to run the risk of being killed. But if I fall, I’ll fall five feet four inches forward in the fight for freedom. I’m not backing off.”
A reporter from Austin’s NPR Station KUT 90.5 reached out to me about a one-on-one interview to be featured on Morning Edition this summer. Their initial pitch in an email stated that they wanted some context about Austin’s racial past, amid protests against police violence and systemic racism. I knew that this could be a make or break your career moment, and that I had to address the history about the United States and it’s truths. Though not really wanting to discuss this at the time, due to my own mental sanity I knew that it was important to speak in the midst of darkness. My ancestors did it and had dogs biting them and fighting off angry mobs in the name of justice for African Americans. Once, I found out that that the library administration approved of the interview taking place, my body began to shift into nervousness.
In retrospect, it was an intense meeting of the minds and the questions asked were well thought out in a boardroom of whiteness. I sat and thought about my ancestors and what they went through and how history has always been told through white people’s eyes and it is far time for all of that jazz to end. I expressed over and over about the importance of knowing your history. I am glad that I stuck with my gut and researched what I thought would be presented for discussion points, and viewed quotes by my favorite African American leaders archived in history. Honestly, I cried after the interview. I had to get out my crib and breathe. I drove to the Michael’s to pick up some candles. While shopping, the reporter called me back and asked me to put together a book list.
As a librarian, when someone asks me for an African American book list I take the task seriously. I stood in the aisle looking at the varied amount of candles before me and started thinking about the moments that led up until March 2020 and having to leave my professional office, and now trying to make sense of being quarantined in my home because of a COVID-19. Now, an added layer has been placed on the backs of us all, the world is an uproar due to more lives being lost in the Black community at the hands of police brutality. All of of it has been taxing and this was/is the time that I needed to be honest with myself…I am tired of being the go to person about what is wrong with white people and their issues with African Americans.
I am not here to teach white people on a daily basis about what they have did/done to African American people; they must accept the truth about (their) history and deal with it. I will take it one step further why is Black scholarship important now, when in fact African Americans were told for 400 years that they were not teachable and they feared for their lives if they even tried to read a bible scripture? I ask questions because my questions matter. Answering them will take some thought and I ask that you read a little bit, regardless of your ethnic background. Then and only then will we both be able to have a civil conversation…when you can earnestly do the work and accept your own inherited racism as a white person — not your privilege.
I purchased three candles, got back in my SUV, and headed back to my abode. As, I was driving I thought about still being a work in progress and that I can meet anyone where they are…yet, I get to control the narrative and how it will be presented — it is my history. I stand on the words of Civil Rights Leader & Organizer, Ella Baker for inspiration, “One of the things that has to be faced is the process of waiting to change the system, how much we have got to do to find out who we are, where we have come from and where we are going.” — This is the first book list where I received phone calls, text and social media messages, and emails about it’s content. I remixed the book list and added four more titles. Download the curated list, share it, and let me know what you think.
