A Comprehensive List of RXBAR Flavors Ranked, Correctly
By Someone Who Would Never Rank Mixed Berry Higher Than Peanut Butter
In the past few months, RXBARS have become my go-to snack food / protein bar of choice. I always have a few bars stashed somewhere in my kitchen, backpack, and/or purse. They’re convenient, relatively healthy, and they taste good. I’m such a fan I even buy seasonal flavors online. So when I saw The Kitchn story in which they taste-tested and ranked all the flavors of RXBARS, I was at first intrigued to see their opinion, and then disappointed (and almost angered) by their rankings.
Anyone who would rank the fruit flavors ahead of the peanut butter flavors is clearly not a normal person. There is no scenario in the world in which you could convince me a “mixed berry” flavored anything would be better than its “peanut butter” flavored counterpart. Go ahead. Think about it. The only exception might be a margarita. But pie? Cookies? Candy bars? The actual food itself? Peanut butter always trumps mixed berry.
And thus, I set off to eat every flavor of RXBAR (including the exclusive seasonal flavors), jot down my thoughts in a free-writing kind of way, and do my own ranking.
Now I present to you…
RXBar Flavors Ranked By Someone Who Would Never Rank Mixed Berry Higher Than Peanut Butter
14. Mixed Berry
Imagine taking like 5–6 fruit leathers, stacking them up, and smooshing them together into a bar. That’s Mixed Berry. I guess if you’re some kind of fruit-leather obsessed person you’d be offended by this bar’s placement in this position, but whatevs. You might like The Kitchn’s list instead.
13. Apple Cinnamon
Do you remember Apple Cinnamon Pop Tarts? The unfrosted ones? (Do they even make those anymore? I don’t know.) But this is them, re-imagined. Not cloyingly sweet or fake tasting. It’s strange that the apple flavor comes through even though they don’t contain real apples, just “Natural Apple Flavor”. Probably good with ice cream. Vanilla ice cream. Definitely tastes like Quaker Apple Cinnamon instant oatmeal.
12. Maple Sea Salt
Literally tastes like you are chugging maple syrup. But chewier. Like pancakes. Yes, that’s it: pancakes. This one has pecans in it which is a really nice flavor not found in the other RXBARS, and I wish they’d make more bars with pecans. I really hated this bar the first time I tried it because it really hits you hard with the maple flavor, but I’m kind of liking it now. Maybe you need to give this bar two chances. Or maybe you need to eat it on a rainy day in fall. This bar makes me want to go skiing.
11. Chocolate Sea Salt
Brownie-batter-taste meets Tootsie-Roll-texture. Reminiscent of Little Debbie frosted brownies (the ones that come in two squares with nuts on top). Even though this one is chocolate, and I am a chocolate fiend, I can’t rank it higher because it’s similarity to a Tootsie Roll is off-putting.
10. Pumpkin Spice
Like a really good, soft, and chewy gingerbread cookie baked by your grandmother, with a hint of carrot cake flavor. The type of cookie you sneak-eat in the kitchen over and over again until you lose count of how many you’ve eaten. This one tastes like wintertime dessert and not at all like it may be remotely healthy. Probably would be AMAZING with vanilla ice cream.
9. Blueberry
Fake blueberry but in a good way, like blueberry Eggo waffles or blueberry pancakes or Blueberry Morning cereal.
8. Coconut Chocolate
Definitely coconutty but also kind of bland? One bite is intense coconut like a macaroon and then the next is bland chewiness with chocolate chips and almond. But you can’t really go too wrong with chocolate + coconut. Kind of meh but still a decent choice.
7. Gingerbread
Similar to Pumpkin Spice (see above) but more gingery and less pumpkiny. A teeny, tiny bit reminiscent of candied ginger. A little less overwhelmingly spicy than Pumpkin Spice. More mild. And that’s a good thing. Kinda gingersnappy but without the snap.
6. Chocolate Chip
Chewy, almondy, and chocolatey. Sort of like the chocolate chip cookie dough chunks you find in ice cream.
5. Mint Chocolate
I like this one a lot, but I love chocolate chip mint ice cream. And that’s what this tastes like. To a T. A really good chocolate chip mint ice cream, but chewy.
4. Coffee-Chocolate
I do not understand, not even a little bit, how The Kitchn ranked this one last. I mean: COFFEE AND CHOCOLATE. The only reason you’d hate this bar is if you don’t like coffee. So don’t eat it if you have no appreciation for coffee. This one tastes like espresso with chocolate chunks and almonds. Definitely eat this one if you enjoy dunking biscotti in your coffee or if you enjoy chocolate-covered espresso beans.
3. Mango Pineapple
This was a seasonal flavor, available over the summer. Dried mango on steroids. A bit like a Fruit Roll-up but the adult version. Pineapple-y and fruity but not fake tasting at all.
If you’re a little surprised I let a fruit flavor into the top 3, let me explain. What is the best dried fruit? It’s Mango. Hands down. Mango. Not the sweetened dried mango, just plain old dried mango (like this). So one thing this bar has going for it is pure clean mango flavor. Secondly, maybe I was swayed by it’s limited-time availability? Maybe. I don’t know. But this one is definitely good and shadowed only by the peanut butters…
2. Peanut Butter Chocolate
Identical flavor to a Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Odwalla bar (previously one of my favorite bars, but I don’t think they make them anymore?) Totally could be dessert. Peanutty and not too chocolatey. Almost more milk chocolate-y than dark chocolate, somehow. Could eat like 5 of them in a row.
1. Peanut Butter
As close to the taste of eating peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon as you can get without actually doing so. And trust me, I do that enough that I’d know how that tastes.
So, there you have it!
A comprehensive ranking of RXBAR flavors as written by someone who is clearly a little too obsessed with these things and who also has an unnatural, constant craving for all things peanut butter.
Do you agree with my rankings? How about The Kitchn’s? I’m sure you have an opinion of your own so tell me how right or wrong I am!
PS — I was in no way, shape, or form sponsored by RXBAR nor The Kitchn in the production of this story. I just like food.
