Rejected Alternatives to “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee”

“Tech Bros in Teslas Getting Tacos” does have a nice ring to it…

Photo by Chris Knight on Unsplash

Actresses in Airplanes Getting Airsick 
 (cleaning crew demanded pay raise)

90’s Boy Bands in Buses Getting Blow Outs
 (nobody cares about these guys anymore)

Democrats in Denim Getting Dairy Queen 
 (only Joe Biden signed on)

Egomaniacs in Elevators Getting Emasculated 
 (egomaniacs are difficult to work with)

Football Players in Ferraris Getting Fat-Free Fig Newtons 
 (currently casting)

Golden Globe Winners in Go-Karts Getting Green Tea Enemas
(currently casting)

Heavyweight Boxers in Helicopters Getting Hamburgers
(potential issues with helicopter passenger max weight limit)

Ice Sculptors on Ice Skates Getting Ice Cream Sodas
(too cold)

James Bond Actors on Jetskis Getting Jamba Juice 
(Pierce Brosnan is being a dick about it)

Kardashians in Kias Getting KFC
(slated for 2030 when they’ve reached peak desperation)

Late Night Talk Show Hosts in Lyfts Getting Latkes
(Jimmy Fallon not a fan of potatoes)

Musicians on Mopeds Getting Meatloaf
(too much confusion with the Meat Loaf of “I’d Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That)” fame)

News Anchors in Nightclubs Getting Negronis
(serious potential here)

Oprah in O…
(nevermind, probably occupied with that presidency thing)

Politicians on Paddleboards Getting Pummeled with Pomegranates
(offensive to the pomegranate industry)

Queer Eye Cast in Qdoba Getting Qdoba
(*sponsored by Qdoba)

Racecar Drivers in Racecars Getting…
 (nah too boring)

Supermodels on Segways Getting Sandwiches
(Gisele won’t own up to her secret passion for Philly Cheesesteak)

Tech Bros in Teslas Getting Tacos
(market too taco-oversaturated)

Ugg-wearers on Unicycles Getting Unicorn Frappuccinos
(Uggs impede operation of unicycles)

Vegans on Vespas Getting Vapes
(so annoying on so many levels)

Writers on Water Skis Getting Waxed
(nobody’s gonna watch a show starring writers)

X-Rated Movie Stars in Xtra Mart Getting Molson XXX
(probably not family-friendly)

Yoga Instructors in Yellow Cabs Getting Yodels
(lack of consensus on use of “Yodels” vs “Ho Hos”)

Zoolander: On a Zamboni Getting Zeppole
 (already the title of the next Ben Stiller movie)