My Reaction to My son’s Independent Approach and What it Taught Me

My son Alex was invited to a birthday party at an art space. It was for a friend of his from pre-school though they were now in Kindergarten at different schools. The group was, nonetheless, mostly kids we all knew. I looked forward to seeing some of the moms and dads and for Alex to see his old crew.

The room was set in the typical birthday party configuration — food on one side and the art project set-up on the other. Presents were to be piled up on the designated table at the entrance.

The kids rolled in by…

How hugging my 4-year-old helped me finally feel a connection to the mother I lost at that age.

Photo by Kelly-Ann Tan on Unsplash

Last week, my son turned four.

Yesterday morning, as he raced his new MTA trains down the hallway, I noticed a clear pivot from toddler to kid.

Then, last night, the usual chorus at bedtime took a turn from:
“Brush your teeth.”
“Mommy, come.”
“Brush. Brush. Up and down. All around!” I sing.
“Mommy, watch me!” he sings back.

to him saying:
“I don’t need your help. You can go.”

I hovered at the door outside the bathroom, feeling sad and defiant, and wondering about myself at his age. How did my mother contend with what was likely similar behavior?

Trying to Help My Son (and Myself) Navigate Mean

Photo by jean wimmerlin on Unsplash

My 7-year-old son, Alex, had to get a full-arm cast yesterday. He fell hard off a pogo stick, landing square on his elbow, after a friend relayed that he can pogo with no hands and my son tried to do same. It is a small fracture and thankfully was not worse.

There are lessons to be learned in everything and my husband and I took this as an opportunity to gently point out, “if it doesn’t sound like a good idea, then it probably isn’t.” …

Photo credit: Daria Volkova on Unsplash

Among the things that annoyed me most about my dad is, in the current climate, the thing I miss the most. Would he know how to handle this situation — this global pandemic? It seemed he lived his life for this kind of eventuality. So I have been thinking, as I check the newsfeed ten too many times each day: what would Daddy do if he were still here today? Certainly, some of the variables would be familiar to him.

When I came along, my dad was already what we consider old. He was the age of most of my…

I am in my room at the foot of the bed. My mom is napping in it. I am about to turn five.

“Mommy. Somebody’s at the door.” She stirs.

“Mommy. Get up….!

Our doorbell is ringing. The people ringing it are dressed up. I want to be dressed up too.

…Do I have a costume?” I ask…perhaps whining.

It seems I don’t. My mom didn’t get me one. She forgot. So did my Dad. I feel so bad. A feeling I would later know to be shame. Even more specifically, it is the first time I realize I feel…

I was going to write this next piece on how bad I feel and chime in on this unsettling time but I don’t have anything particularly new to say that hasn’t been said. So I thought perhaps I’d avoid the topic all together and talk about something completely not stressful. Like Tastykakes.

Last week, I learned how Tastykakes are a big deal to the people of Philadelphia.

We were in Philly for a friend’s daughter’s Bat Mitzah and amidst a beautiful and glittery set-up of decor in hot pink and white, there was a large bowl of white-frosted cakes in…

Snapshot in an Uber pool

Late yesterday afternoon, I made plans to visit a friend who I had just learned had lost her mother. A glitch between our texts (was it an iPhone v. Android issue?), lead me to miss details about the shiva. An actual phone call got to the bottom of crossed texts and I wanted to see her before she left for the holidays in the morning. I debated whether to drive or just subway it to Brooklyn. It was 6:30 pm on a Saturday night and a quick Google Maps consult yielded the same ETA for…

Some musings about cruising around LA

We moved to LA for a few music projects and a trial run in whether we want to make the jump from East coast to West.

These are just a few off the cuff observations I thought about while making our way around town, in no particular order.

Alkalized water is the drinking water in town. It is on supermarket shelves and in yoga studio water coolers. Alkaline water, in very layman’s terms, is purportedly less acidic and thus may have health benefits over tap water. My curiosity piqued, I did a little reading…

As was the subject of my last post here, over the last year, we have been jockeying to find more space and thus, contemplating a move from New York City. To the suburbs, the country, or another city all together.

When I started this exploration, my friend put me in touch with a lady who had relocated to LA, one of the top contenders for that “another city all together.” I have a few good friends and colleagues in LA, and even some cousins but I do like to gather intell from anyone who is willing to share their experience…

Crossroads by me

Deciding where to live next has become a circular conversation.

There are people who pick up and move to a new city out of boredom, wanderlust, opportunity, a break-up, a rut, school, job. Many go from one place to another due to life circumstances that make moving a necessity — from good ones to terrible.

My ex-boyfriend moved to Atlanta instead of joining me in New York after college just because he heard it was cool. It was on the verge of becoming Hotlanta and he was to be part of it. That moment has been found recently in Austin…

Wutz the Deals?

Singer, songwriter, writer, obsessive observer, producer of goings on

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