Time is NOT the best healer.
Whenever something bad happens in our lives, we comfort ourselves with one thought, our friends and family give us this same thought as advice ,the same advice that they were given in similar situations and we all have learned to believe in, as a general truth:
“Time is the best healer”
and it almost always does make us feel better, but does it really change anything?
Following this advice, we just wait for the time to pass and make us accept, forget and move on.
Well, time is not the one thing that heals you.
Make this simple question to yourself: “How much time does it really take someone to heal?” Our advisors usually claim, that it depends on the depth of the pain, on the “size” of the tragedy. Moreover, it is never guaranteed, that the healing will come soon or it will be 100% complete.
For some people this process can last a few weeks, for others, it could take years,
so why time treats better some people than others?
Do people do something differently to “speed” the healing process?
With the conclusion, that time is a doctor that works differently for everyone and keeping in mind that, to heal yourslef, you will have to go through a long way of depression and pain (that is “necessary” for the healing process), does this truly sound helpful?
Then, one day-it will be a day far enough on time-you will be able to forget the tragedy and move on, but in the meantime, you will have lost valuable time from your life, valuable opportunities that you didn’t take because you were waiting for time to heal you, valuable moments that you didn’t live because you didn’t feel ready, because you didn’t feel that you deserved them.
To understand the truth, let's take an example of the “healing” process of time:
You just experienced a very difficult situation: an unexpected tragedy, that changed your whole life plan, so you decide to “lock” yourself in your misery, refusing to go on in your life, because you have convinced yourslef, that there is nothing to be done to make things better and only time can change how you currently feel.
So you grieve for your bad “fate”, creating a tone of negative thoughts and only experiencing negative feelings. The bad feelings create more bad thoughts and the miserable thoughts lead to more unpleasant feelings. This creates a circle, that traps you in your new, self-made reality. Days go by, weeks go by, months, years…and you expect from time, to bring you a change, to bring you a good thing, so that you will feel better, and change your negative thoughts, but how exactly is this going to happen if you live the same day, every day, within the circle of negativity?
How long are you willing to wait for a “miracle” from the outside?
The truth is different than what we tend to believe, the truth is that,
The healer of everything is YOU.
your inner WILL
YOU at the PRESENT MOMENT
There is no time, there is no past, there are no worries for your future. Decide now, that you don’t want to feel sad and miserable anymore ,that an unfortunate event of the past cannot define your future. That no one, no matter how much they have hurt you, deserves one more day of your life to think about them, to get stuck in a moment that has long gone and you still let it “haunt” your present like a movie on replay.
Our thoughts and feelings are the best healers.
Despite any unfortunate event that happens in our lives,
When we feel grateful for what we already have,
When we feel confident that the best is about to come,
When we feel sure that everything is going to be alright,
our thoughts will turn to positive and “erase” this negative moment from our brain. Without feelings like anger and hate in our hearts, we are free to visualize of beautiful things, to let space for positive, powerful feelings, that fill us with joy (and this creates a positive circle of thoughts and feelings), we only see the light, the darkness that we spread around us, will fade away. That moment of that change is where the magic happens.
It doesn’t take time. Time is now.