Tom’s Diner

Beck: “So, what would be the best place, or at least a suitable place for this kind of, umm…you know, business?”

Carl: “If you ask me, a half filled diner like this ought to be perfect; amateur enough for a professional job!”

Beck: “You are insane! Wait a minute! Are you serious? cause if you are, I take back my words. You’re worse than insane”

Carl: “Hold on! Stop judging me so soon. What’s so amiss about this place, pray tell me?”

Beck: “I’m not having this conversation with you. Pulling off a…a…”

Carl: “A murder, I believe thats the word you’re looking for”

Beck: “Yes! thank you! Goddamn you Carl! This ain’t no joke! They said you was a serious guy”

Carl: “Ah! And the they that you talk about so frequently. Did they tell you that this was such a bad place?”

Beck: “So, you are seriously gonna pull me into talking about this bullshit plan of yours. Okay lets see, no they didn’t. Its just….”

Carl: “Tell me, c’mon I wanna hear! What’s so bad about this place, this time that you would be scared of pulling a trigger here rather than elsewhere?”

Beck: “Okay, if you so desperately wanna hear how absurd this is. Where should I start? Let’s see, firstly all of these people, any one of them could be talking to the cops the next day and would stand testimony in my fucking trail. How’s that for a fucking loophole, eh!”

Carl: “Hold on now, take it easy. By these people, you mean the people present at the crime scene when it happened right?”

Beck: “Jesus! Of course, who else could I mean?”

Carl: “Let me ask you a question. How many people are there in this diner presently?”

Beck: “What? I dunno! What sort of a ques, 6 maybe 7. Who cares? This is ridiculous!”

Carl: “Wait up! Now, from what I remember there is that old woman right in the corner there with her cat. From the way she looks at all of us its easy to say that she’s practically blind. Her glasses are an inch thick and she still squeezes her eyes to find that pot on the table. Her evidence would be worthless! Any half decent lawyer could prove that she couldn’t be sure of what she was seeing, let alone who she was seeing! And all of this of course if she survives until the hearing, which looking at her condition, I wouldn’t be very sure of!”

Beck: “That’s funny, really funny, you know Carl. Look, I’m laughing now. Can we please just finish with this bullshit and get down to some serious business, Jesus!”

Carl: “That’s the problem with you kids! You think you’re smart and sophisticated and you’ll just finish him off with the silencer nippled on your tour eagle in the dark alley behind their goddamn house! Next thing you know you’re standing in the courtroom and you don’t even recognize the person who’s words are gonna send you straight to the chair, cause you just didn’t see that pickpocket in the dark, now did you? But he saw you. And he saw everything that you did and them bam, its done! Next thing you know, you’re strapped up and that switch is pulled down.”

[Beck quietens down. Drinks a glass of water]

Beck: “I didn’t say the alley behind his house was a good idea.”

Carl: “Neither is this diner according to you. So, coming back to the people here. Now apart from the old lady there’s the three guys in their custom made suits with their cars waiting for them downstairs. Those smug bastards! Drinking their morning coffee and reading their morning thing! They’re gonna come nowhere near the court, lemme tell you that, they got their high paying jobs, ain’t they? To look after and their reputations! They’re gonna run away the instant they hear that shot and are never gonna come back again!”

Beck: “You don’t know that…”

Carl: “Oh yes sir I do! Look at them! All married, earn 6 figures, working in that advertising firm down the lane. You think they wanna get mixed up in a court case like this? No sir, not them! And even if one of them has a golden, oh so golden heart, that you speak of, the other two won’t let him. They’’ll remind him of what he stands to lose and if he’s smart enough to earn that suit, he won’t even need nobody to talk to him. And then there are the lovebirds in the corner. They’re gonna talk to no one cause if their families find out, they’ll be done for. With their secret love being flushed out in the courthouse and even if their families did find out, oh! they wouldn’t expose their kids to all of this, not at this tender age, so that leaves Tom at the counter and lemme tell you one thing about Tom. He’s a sucker, a sucker for the green! Just shove some down his throat and nothing’s gonna ever come out. Add to that the fact that you’re wearing that fake beard and glasses and you’re a free bird.”

Beck: “I didn’t know you’d noticed the glasses.”

Carl: “I’ve been doing this a long time, Beck. Oh c’mon! That was easy. So now tell me, what do you think of my plan?”

Beck: “I…I…dunno. It seems like, like pushing the American system a bit too far. But it does sound logical.”

Carl: “There you go! And now for the finishing tips. Drop the clean weapon on the table. Walk out, hail a cab and get to your favourite bar. That’s it, so clean, so easy just that….”

Beck got up and pulled the gun up from behind. Holding it wrapped in the handkerchief, he shot two bullets down Carl’s front. The shirt soaked. The kids shrieked. The men cowered behind their papers. The old lady dropped the pot. Tom stared. Beck dropped the eagle, no silencer, on the table, walked out, yelled “Taxi!”, got in, got off at 5th avenue, went in to Kimmy’s and got a beer.

A few hours later he went up to Tom’s place and paid him after he’d got the confirmation that he would stay shut. The way Tom looked at the bills, he knew he was fine.

“…and also the murder of noted assassin and murderer Patrick Watson, known also by at least seven different names. Watson was shot dead in a diner this morning. The police suspect that this is the work of the crime syndicate Watson was partners with who ironically used another paid assassin. The choice of the crime scene was rather unusual, which has led people to believe that the killer could possible be an amateur, starting out int he business. Rumors suggest no one present at the crime scene is willing to come forward to give testimony, because of the fear of getting caught amidst a gang war, which is making things difficult for the NYPD. Patrick Watson was charged with 17 murders, although unofficial reports say the number would be close to 50. Stay tuned to Fox News as we return after this short commercial”