Linda Caroll, Vasana, let me add my 2 cents…
Yes, there is only one Lorena Bobbit, but there are a lot of women who act as abusers. Look at the study from Lara Stemple:
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/sexual-victimization-by-women-is-more-common-than-previously-known/
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4062022/
(please do read them both, they have a valid and important point)
And we can only imagine how many cases of female abuse against men go unreported because of the social stigma men face due to the popular notion that females are victims and males abusers. Also note, than in most of the world countries a rape done by a woman is not legally considered rape.
While one study doesn’t prove that women are perpetrators in the same amount as men, we cannot ignore the large amount of female abusers… Linda, how does that fit with your “there’s no toxic femininity” theory?
And there’s an interesting detail in this study… the prison statistics.
In the patriarchic society women usually don’t have as much power as men, but when they come in the position of power (like in prison), it seems they tend to be perpetrators even more than men:


https://www.bjs.gov/content/pub/pdf/svrfsp08.pdf
And this is especially emphasized when it comes to jouvenile victims where women are in the position of even greater power:

https://www.bjs.gov/content/pub/pdf/svjfry12.pdf
In the last case almost 90% of perpetrators were female, and I cannot imagine a more horrible form of abuse than abusing young children…
Also, there’s one important point which everyone in this feminism-patriarchism battle seems to ignore… domestic violence against children. Male children generally experience phisical violence more than female ones, and statistics show that mothers are abusers in the same amount (or sometimes slightly more) as fathers:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1448305/
https://americanspcc.org/child-abuse-statistics/
https://repositorium.sdum.uminho.pt/bitstream/1822/41448/1/romero2014.pdf
So Linda, if the term “toxic femininity” bothers you so much, please find another term for the wast amount of women who sexually victimize men or abuse children. Because it’s real and it’s happening more than you think.