Why we need Authenticity-Yoga

Practicing authenticity is difficult but crucial. Here is why and what to do about it.

Yoga is a practice

Yoga is a practice. You don’t start your yoga journey with a head-stand. You slowly learn, make mistakes, get better, fail and fall back, and repeat. If you persist long enough with the uncomftableness of the practice, you might get to the wished head stand. You might even receive benefits you never thought you would! For example, feeling more energized, more connection with your body in the everyday, more calmness and focus, etc.

Authenticity is a practice

Authenticity is not something you are born with, or just turn on one day. It is a process of discovery and understanding yourself more deeply. Much of our decision-making and behaviors comes from subconscious processes, So, coming into authenticity is shining the light on what makes us tick, by listening and acting upon it more intentionally.

• For example, when a friend says something that rubs you the wrong way. You might not know why, and you might decide to ignore it for the sake of “keeping the peace”. But practicing your authenticity would mean to turn towards that uneasiness. To give it space. first in yourself, and then to your friend. A voice inside you wants to be heard, and the more you give space to all your voices to be heard by you, the more integrated and authentic you will become.

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The problem with practicing authenticity

Authenticity can be dangerous. your authenticity is revealed mostly in scenarios where the stakes are high. When expressing it can easily lead to conflict. To lose respect, or a job, or a loved one. It feels impossible to try and practice your inner voice when so much can go wrong if you do.

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Why is it crucial to practice it?

Authenticity is what we look for in our leaders. When we are directionless and lost(as many of us are in these times of uncertainty) we look externally for answers. To teachers, mentors, world leaders, scientists and content creators. It’s their authenticity and connection to themselves that is a calming, magnetizing center for us. Yet we never try to cultivate that same quality within us. We look for answers outside that are rarely tailored to us. Without understanding our own inner leader and cultivating it, we will continue to get lost in every new bout of uncertainty.

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The age of easy external answers

It’s not our fault. It’s way easier to google “how to deal with my relationship issues” than to actually contemplate it yourself. Or even talk about it with a friend to understand how you truly feel.

• Our brain was made for efficiency, so fast easy answers are way more lucrative for it. And if someone else can to the work and find the answer for us, all the better!
• As science has become our new god, we turn to it and all the labels we accumulated in all our googling, from attachment theory to the nervous system to inner children. All helpful labels and ideas that we focus on without seeing where we are in the middle of all this. How we bring all that is inside us, together. One voice to lead them all. That is the purpose of cultivating our authenticity.

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Impossible choice

So, if you’ve read this far, you might agree with me that the problem is that practicing authenticity is crucial, but it’s also really difficult. The stakes are high when you do and when you don’t. So what do you do?

Enter Authentic Relating, AKA Authenticity yoga.

Authentic relating are a set of practices that create a simple yet powerful framework to practice authenticity. They were developed in the 90s from a practiced called circling, which was a practice of relational meditation, exploration of an emerging group experience in the present moment. In my next piece, I will share exactly why I believe that Authentic Relating is the answer to our impossible situation. Stay tuned!

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