Patriarchy, male hegemony and patriarchal bargain
What is fundamentally so awesome about males that they control the entire world? Is it something biological or anthropological or is it social or psychological?
Some people argue that men are programmed for fast reflexes and possess more physical strength due to years of hunting and gathering. But you know right? Women used to hunt for themselves and their children. The institution of marriage did not exist and females single handedly raised their children.
I have recently observed a lot of men complaining about females being naive and innocent. But, mind you, not if she dumped them. Well, this clearly implies that men are expecting us to dump them, and if we do not, then they call us naive. Hahaha..
My cousin recently mentioned about a female friend who would almost always misinterpret his words which made him think that she was dumb. When asked if any of his male friends misinterpret facts or statements, he said that yes! but females do it more often than males!
Maybe this isn’t about who does it more often. We have been taught from our childhood that females are weak(mentally, physically and emotionally) and thus when we see any characteristic trait which represents weakness even in 1 female, we generalize it to the entire female gender. Similarly, we focus on characteristics of males that represent them as physically or mentally strong , generalize them and proudly broadcast them. In addition, our value system distinguishes not just in these characteristics but also the gender they are attached to. For example: dominant males are an asset to the society while dominant females are not liked much.
The problem aggravates when females become the agents of patriarchy, to what sociology calls the ‘patriarchal bargain’. When a guy says that girls are so bitchy and the only girl in the group agrees to it, while reaffirming that she(herself) is an exception, it is a manifestation of patriarchal bargain. When my grandmother says that your brother will glorify our name, you would anyways go to someone else’s house, she reaffirms her value in the male dominated society by supporting them.
All of this has made me think that if the entire control actually lies within our hands and we have undermined ourselves to bring about that change. Eudoria Holmes, Margaret Mead, Rani Laxmi Bai, Madam Curie, Rakhambai and many other women have proved in the past that we can have an egalitarian society. The issue in hand is how do we bring this change at an all society level?
Education seems to be an obvious starting point. However, I think that the present mindset of educators is not enough. We have to build a mindset which can constantly question the existing norms, be it scientific or social. A generation with enough self-confidence to challenge and enough flexibility to understand different points of views. I think, then, we would be able to sit, discuss and debate anything and everything and bring it to some actionable conclusion.
