2nd INNINGS — Journeying through Transition and Exploring the Edge
First Innings — Techie life
My early professional techie life, started 20 years ago, as a software engineer after having studied computer science, like most others of my era. Dealing with technology messiness, became my second nature, especially having worked in US, in various high-tech startups in Silicon valley for about 12–13 years. This early part, with all its long hours, burnouts, struggles, layoffs, heart-sinks, however gave me some money, a little recognition within a small community of like-minded professionals, but mostly, it gave me the resources to be bold and confident in my professional pursuit.
For the past 5 years, I have also been a bootstrapped product-software entrepreneur. Dealing with Market messiness. Do-whatever-it-takes attitude, has actually become my primary nature, especially as I explored both the tough Indian Product-software market, as well as the US disruptive exponential software markets. In essence, the dual-immersion of technology messiness and market messiness has been my ground of operation, and the heroes’ journey has largely occupied my headspace.
In the past couple of years, or mostly after I crossed 40, I have started questioning the meaning of being a work-o-holic. Bodyaches of sheer long-hours, headaches of product releases, heartaches of repeated customer rejections, business failure, are a burden that I no longer carry easily. I have been looking for better work-life balance, while seeking clarity as to the nature (both primary and secondary nature) of my pursuits.
Half-time — Fuzzy life?
Its interesting that as I seek clarity and balance, I embrace the world of fuzzies. Clarity and fuzziness are diametrically opposite isn’t it? But for some reason the world of psychology-sociology messiness has been called the world-of-fuzzies, mostly by techies, largely because we don’t understand them. There I said it. No techies don’t know everything, In fact, we mostly don’t experientially understand things at all.
While messiness is a reality, I no longer believe in just what my headspace tells me. I have developed an intuitive sense (gutspace) that there is certainly more to life, than just the over-glorified hero’s journey. I mean come on, my own journey is that of a burnt-out bricoleur, not a hero’s journey. I am now a techie, turned fuzzy too. One, who not-only does not believe just in his headspace, but who also believes in his gutspace, heartspace and many other fuzzy spaces.
So, what about the other journeys? Like me, almost 90% entrepreneurs are burnt-out bricoleurs. So may be there are journeys of a depressed underachiever, gifted gambler, overwhelmed procrastinator? In fact, I see many frustrated-fighters every day (everybody except them, know, that they are not heroes :)). I am definitely interested to learn about many other types of journeys. Frankly, I can see my self clearly transitioning from early-life to midlife. I am standing on the edge of entering the mid-life. An edge is the between-space of what is now and what is trying to happen next. At half-time, my second-innings explorations are more likely around the significance of my life’s journey, which is very different from the first innings, which was around success of my life’s journey.
Second Innings — Balanced Life (Techie-Fuzzy Integration)
Living a Startup life, examining the entrepreneur/founder’s journey, dealing with failures, navigating the VUCA world, are definitely not easy. In the past few years however, my inner journey has helped me cope with some of my own resistances, difficulties, conflicts and awkwardness. I have started to listen to my heart and my gut. My gut sense is, if I manage to go over the edge rather than applying headspace-based avoidance patterns (such as approach edge, step back, repeat), then something new emerges, allowing us to gain personal growth. To go over the edge and to intentionally encounter holistic experiences one needs to become embedded in communities (Sanghas). Coming from a Software community, I am acutely aware of the power of Collective endeavors, especially through various volunteer-led open-source projects. In the open-source world, we go over-the-edge, make ourselves vulnerable, by opening our body-of-work, and exposing the bugs in our code, shortcomings in our understanding, and seek for help, from the community, to fix our blind-spots. As Linus law states, “given enough eyeballs, all bugs are shallow.” Second Innings is perhaps then, metaphorically getting-naked, relating to men and women whose caring eyes, and empathetic confrontation, can help me fix the various shortcomings within me, to make my journey significant and substantive.
I have been intentionally and accidentally been part of various communities like iSPIRT, Sumedhas, Refreshed space and oneness community. In the process, I have realized how intently I am drawn to group-facilitation and experiential-coaching, and towards co-creating community spaces for people. One such space that we have launched is Urja, a space to explore this phenomenon of transition and going-over-the-edge. It is our intent to establish a community of ‘transitionaries’, who come together through an experiential program like Urja to move beyond the solitary experience of reflecting upon their own transition, and instead engage with the community through sharing their experiences collectively. Second Innings is also perhaps about redesigning LIFE, to journey through transition with fellow co-travellers. In my second innings, I am committed to examine and explore further such accidental journeys as well as intentional journeys.
Are you in your second innings too? We know there are professionals/entrepreneurs who are also tired and weary with all the blows-and-punches they have absorbed. Whose jobs/business might be just-okay, but there is fear of uncertainty due to intermittent nature of jobs/markets. Are you confused, and looking for clarity and balance between the techie and fuzzy? Are you committed to explore the accidental and intentional journeys of transition? Are you a transitionary, looking over the edge? What if you could tap into a cohort of fellow transitionaries — something more than a community — a tribe that you can lean on and be yourself, share your fears, aspirations and motivations, without worrying about being judged. Let me introduce Kavita here. I have known Kavita from the OD and coaching space for close to 2 years now. Its been a journey of mutual respect and friendship, as we co-create, co-travel and co-explore the various phenomenological and existential challenges of work-life spaces. We think that you will agree that such transitionary-tribes and exploratory-spaces are rare in general and definitely so here in India. Kavita and I have co-designed Urja, around experiential interventions that increase empathy, relatedness and compassion, which are especially important in increasing emotional intelligence which helps in navigating transition and also has a direct correlation with well-being and happiness.
So, what are you waiting for? Visit the website, apply to participate and spread the words to your friends and fellows. Look forward in anticipation to work with each and everyone of you. Good luck and all the very best!
