The Power of Baby Steps

I am trilled and nervous at the same time of what I am about to share in this writing. Today I officially went back to workout after 6 months of doing nothing, yes I said it right — NADA — No cardio, zero jumping, zero weight lifting, not to mention I was restricted to have short walks and walk slowly as it can be. These were the instructions not only from the doctor but my mom’s, my aunt’s, my grandma’s, and yes my husband’s too. In doing so, I went from being in the best shape of my life with a 25% body fat and great confidence to a couch potato with 10 extra pounds and 35% BF. Yet, here I am enthusiastic about the momentum that I’ve been gaining in the past couple of weeks with baby steps, one at a time.

Saying, I’ve been a complete couch potato is a lie — said Mr. Ego and give some credit to Mrs. Impatient — .

Early this month, my husband Marcus gifted me a Fitbit tracker and I started walking more consistently, having some runs and hikes here and there. But this week I did something different. I challenged myself with little basic healthy activities that I had to accomplish during the week like walking 10k everyday, and exercise 30 minutes 3 times this week (some actual run, yoga or indoor cardio to break the sweat), eating smaller portions. This challenge was a double win. It consisted on gifting myself my own money!! so for each activity accomplished, I build up my budget for next week fun expenses, limiting from over expending this week and also motivating me to DO, what I said I will do.

This little challenge of mine somehow childish and silly, sprouted the first finds of consistency.

It was until today that I engaged in my first indoor cardio session: a beginners, no jumping youtube video from fitness blender. On a rainy and solitary Friday night, there I was giving my all after such a long time! Man, did I love it?!! YES. It was challenging. YES. All my life, I’ve felt proud of the stamina and flexibility that I have, not to mention my will power to commit to healthy habits.

Today however, I had leg cramps and knee pain. It was so hard to keep up with such a basic routine. The sad part was the emptiness and still sensitive sensation in my belly. But my mind was strong, and that is all it takes to get started and move forward.

Again here I am Today with overweight because…. of what happened to me? No. That will be an excuse. And what happened to me? (you may be asking). I lost a healthy and perfect 21 weeks old baby boy on Valentine’s day. My cervix was 6cm dilated by the time I arrived at the hospital, and it was too late. We called him Lucas, like my mom’s dad. It was tragic. Not only did I lost my baby but 6 weeks later, I went back to the hospital for a couple of nights, caused by an hemorrhage that could have ended up my life. Although, this is another full story on its own, that deserves to have its own place, my point is: Yes this required me to stay still, to be patient, to grow, to grief, to take time, to stop and learn, yet life has to continue and having a clear purpose, is what will help us take those initial baby steps, into bigger ones, until we get to where we want.

Despite the physical hiatus, the decisions I took over my eating habits, are 100% my responsibility. Oh, and I also got a job around the same time I lost Lucas, which also impacted my already sedentary life.

So, I have loses, a job, a husband, and why not? I love to eat. Oh and today is Friday, one of those Fridays in which I choose to work until 7pm in a code bug that I did not solved anyway... And rather than putting them as my excuse not to workout, today instead, I decided to feel proud, by DOING ONE LITTLE STEP towards my healthiest me. I did not lose weight this week but I was more active than I have been in a long time and those first endorphins, make me want more, make me want to wake up and go kill it tomorrow too.

That is all that it takes, the decision to just get started and…actually start.